Lets plan a restructure. 4 books, book about maybe. book 1 feds vs caps, book 2 Lyran vs Glorious Draconis Combine etc
Okay, let's look at some fixes.
Principal Plotlines are:
- Justin Allard's 'disgrace', his exile on Solaris, his recruitment by the Maskirova, rise to prominence, romance of Candace and return home
- the flipside of this with Andrew Redburn and Morgan Hasek-Davion preparing for and then spearheading the battles against the Capellans
- The Kell Hounds vs the Genyosha - attacks on Chara, Silver Eagle Rescue, Morgan's return and the Kell Hounds fighting on the Steiner-Kurita front
I think we still want to do this chronologically, with one book focused mostly but not entirely on each plotline and a grand finale wrapping up all the stories in book four. Chronologically, this means book one is carried by Justin, book two is the Kell Hounds, book three is Andrew and finally book four has the climaxes of both.
Book One - En Garde
A Capellan raid hits a AFFS Training Base. CO Andrew Redburn rushes to the rescue but his XO Justin Allard is maimed in the attack. In the aftermath an investigation reveals Justin's involved in the Capellan underground and he's court martialled. Hanse Davion offers a pardon and has it flung back in his face so he exiles Justin.
Far away, mercenary Daniel Allard can't believe his half-brother's fate and is sure he must be innocent. Having sought refuge in Lyran space (Mariks hate cyborgs and neither Liao nor Kurita will welcome an Allard) a bitter Justin visits Daniel but moves on. It's revealed that Skye's defenses are in mild disarray due to political infighting. Justin is offered a place in the Kell Hounds but declines and heads for Solaris. It's indicated his cybernetic arm is still something of an impairment - except in a 'Mech.
Justin rises to prominence on Solaris both as a gladiator-mechwarrior and in the murky underworld, exploiting black market connections. He becomes the protege of Gray Noton, the man who maimed him, and an out-spoken anti-Davion spokesman with support from the Capellan community and Lyrans opposed to the Steiner-Davion alliance.
Another Capellan attack narrowly avoids killing Andrew Redburn. Evidence now exonerates Justin - but too late. Andrew is reassigned as he's become a focus of aggression. As aide to Morgan Hasek-Davion he visits Tharkad.
On the way back, they accompany Melissa Steiner-Davion to visit the Kell Hounds. Covertly Melissa and Andrew are replaced by doubles and depart on a civilian dropship for the Federated Suns while Morgan plays out the visit.
Justin learns from Gray Noton that a secret mission from the LC to FS is being sent - the dropship with Melissa and Andrew - and that Noton sold the information to the ISF. Justin hesitates and then sends a warning to Dan. The Kell Hounds launch a rescue mission while Morgan Hasek-Davion is forced to stay behind.
The Silver Eagle is fought out but instead of the Genyosha it's an elite DCMS regiment. Patrick still dies in the rearguard. Meanwhile Justin kills Noton and takes his Mech for the finals but LIC now suspect him of being responsible for informing the ISF of Melissa's route. He wins the match and contacts in the Liaoist underground smuggle him to Sian where he meets Max Lian and Michael Hasek-Davion.
Notes:
Rather than Andrew Redburn and Dan Allard both being 'junior' to Justin, moving Andrew up to have been Justin's XO gives an alternate perspective on him. It also positions
Andrew as the better commander than Justin, who's an expert mechwarrior but not so skilled in tactics as in the original. Justin meeting Dan on the way to Solaris is easy geography and develops his character more. Sending Morgan H-D to Tharkad brings him in more and forcing him not to participate in the Silver Eagle rescue shows he's a frustrated warrior. Yorinaga not turning up yet 'softens' the Kell Hounds arc for this book.
Book Two - Lunge
The Kell Hounds regroup on Northwind with help from former Hound Bradley who now commands his own Merc battalion. Via ComStar they learn that Aldo Lestrade is applying political leverage against them for 'abandoning their post' since they can't reveal the importance of their rescue mission. Leadership falls to Salome and she asks Dan to use his connections to find Morgan and tell him what happened. Meanwhile she's going to take the Kell Hounds to Arc Royal to bury Patrick on his homeworld.
Takashi Kurita reads reports of Patrick's 'Phantom 'Mech' and orders Yorinaga Kurita recalled to form an elite formation and deal with the Kell Hounds - a wild card he wants removed. He discusses the strategic menace of the FedCom with Subhash Indrahar and also Theodore's usefuless or lack thereof in his opinion.
Dan consults his father, Quintus Allard, who directs him to Zaniah.
On Sian Justin has been debriefed and appointed an analyst within the Maskirova. He's subordinate to an exceptional officer Alexei Malenkov who warns him to be wary of the politics between the Chancellor's daughters. Justin finds it unavoidable though and he and Candace begin working together to deal with their cybernetic parts.
Dan meets Morgan who first thinks Yorinaga has returned and is horrified to learn Patrick is dead. They travel to Tharkad and Melissa asks Morgan to stand in for her dead father at the wedding. Katrina shares LIC information and confirms Yorinaga will be back shortly. Morgan and Fredrick Steiner joust verbally over politics but each respects the other as a soldier.
Yorinaga Kurita forms the Genyosha and is reunited with his son Akira.
Andrew Redburn is promoted again and takes command of the Davion Light Guards' 'Mech regiment (subordinate to the RCT's own commander of course). Hanse asks Morgan to be best man at the wedding.
Morgan Kell recalls many of his former Kell Hounds. Bradley wants to join them but is still on contract to the Federated Suns. He's authorised to rename his unit as a battalion of the Kell Hounds. Daniel receives a Wolfhound to trial for the LCAF.
Max Liao receives bare moments advance notice from Michael Hasek-Davion of the wedding before his invitation arrives. After putting on a good show he tears into his intelligence chief and has her removed. Alexei Malenkov is promoted to a senior post and brings Justin closer to Liao's attention. He's appointed the Maskirova officer to accompany Max to the wedding.
With covert aid from Lestrade, the Genyosha destroy the Heimdall refugees involved in the Silver Eagle encounter. Using the command chain intended for the wedding, the Kell Hounds arrive but it's too late. Fredrick Steiner's 10th Lyran Guards arrived before them but still too late. Fredrick blames Katrina for the poor defenses but Clovis Holstein swears he'll make the real culprit pay. Morgan sends the refugees to Arc Royal.
The Kell Hounds strike at the Genyosha's base world. The Genyosha are absent and the base is destroyed.
Notes: I originally wanted to end the book with Hanse's wedding speech but there's a lot going on already and that really belongs with the FS-CC conflicts of the next book. Yorinaga's recall being _because_ the Kell Hounds were a problem clears up the reasons for this. As before I switched status between Justin and his ally here, making Alexei Malenkov (Alex Mallory) his boss not his subordinate. A more senior Redburn gets a larger force, setting up for the future. I also shuffled events for the Kell Hounds-Genyosha battles forward and expanded Fredrick Steiner's roles. Also I seeded Bradley earlier on in the story.
Book Three - Riposte
The Wedding on Terra. Tensions between the leaders and Jaime Wolf really beards Takashi Kurita. Yorinaga Kurita and Morgan Kell are perfectly civil. Akira uncovers the ComStar armory below Hilton Head and flirts with Dan and Justin's sister Riva. Dan witnesses a near assassination of his father. Justin knows it was Romano's agent and berates her for it. Hanse Davion's wedding speech and the declaration of war.
Andrew Redburn in action on St Andre, leading the Davion Light Guards to defeat a mercenary battalion of Goliaths.
Morgan remains a frustrated warrior, sent back to New Avalon while the AFFS crushes the CCAF on a dozen worlds.
Alexei and Justin work together to identify AFFS stockpiles to be raided, hopefully crippling the logistics of the offensive.
The Genyosha smash the Kell Hounds battalion led by Bradley, the remnants saved by Team Banzai but remain under pressure.
A second victory for Redburn's Davion Light Guards.
The Northwind Highlanders defect, fuelling Max Liao's paranoia other officers, like Pavel Ridzik.
Data from Michael Hasek-Davion provides the targets for the counter-offensive. Justin adds another world, where he claims advanced military technology is being developed.
Morgan Kell is participating in a LCAF invasion when he receives permission from Katrina to go after the Genyosha at the expense of all other targets. Fredrick is contemptuous of pursuing a private mission when DCMS resistance under Theodore Kurita is hardening.
The counter-strikes, except for Justin's offensive, fail miserably (Justin defeats but doesn't kill Andrew). He leaves behind a disk with a message from Candace Liao to Hanse Davion but is almost killed by a Romano-subverted agent. Alexei Mallory saves him but reminds him he was warned to stay out of politics.
Max Liao orders the assassination of Ridzik but this also fails and he escapes, dropping out of sight. However the failure was due to a message from Alexei and Max orders his arrest, now sure he's Ridzik's man inside the Maskirova. Justin is promoted into Alexei's shoes.
Northwind Highlanders save Team Banzai. The Kell Hounds survivors are sent to rejoin their regiment while Team Banzai are sent back to New Avalon
Michael Hasek-Davion reaches Sian and gets his just desserts.
Notes: most of this is right out of the books. Theodore is played up a little but mostly this is the last half of the old book two and first half of the old book three.
Book Four - Coupe
Theodore Kurita goes on the counter-offensive, potentially cracking open the Isle of Skye and shattering their offensive. He asks Yorinaga Kurita for support but is declined respectfully. He accepts this as long as the Kell Hounds are neutralised.
Max Liao orders a strike on the last working jumpship yard at Kathil, to halt repairs there and force Hanse Davion to slow shipping. The risks of attacking a shipyard are raised.
Hanse breaks the news of Michael's actions and death to a disconsolate Morgan. Morgan asks for a field command but is denied.
Assassins almost kill Katrina Steiner and do kill Melissa's double.
Redburn finds his command sidelined with fresh Capellan March regiments being sent into the fight.
Candace tells Justin she knows the technology from Bethel isn't enough to turn the tide. She reminds him the DCMS is no help, wasting effort eradicating the Wolf Dragoons (which she would otherwise admire them for, a Dragoon played her for a fool years ago), and tells him she'll protect the St Ives worlds at any cost.
The Kell Hounds stop looking for the Genyosha and instead seek to draw them on them with a series of high profile attacks.
The 5th Syrtis Fusiliers are shattered on Sarna and are reported to have attacked an HPG station. ComStar interdicts the Federated Suns.
Clovis Holstein assassinates Lestrade and provides LIC with information about the assassination plot
Hanse finally gives Morgan orders: go to Kathil and set up a forward command post using the shipping lines.
Fredrick Steiner is told of the assassination and that his mentor Lestrade is behind it. He volunteers for a suicide mission to stop Theodore Kurita.
Justin is attacked again by one of Romano's agents. Nowhere seems safe for him now - he barely escapes with his life.
A Sword of Light regiment reaches the Kell Hounds before the Genyosha and the Kell Hounds inflict terrible losses.
Andrew Redburn's battered Davion Light Guards have to fight off the Death Commandos alongside Morgan Hasek-Davion. The 5th Syrtis Fusilier survivors make a combat drop to turn the tide.
Morgan Kell and Yorinaga Kurita duel for the second and last time.
A FAX message authorises Morgan to carry out a retaliatory strike on Sian. He forms the DLC and 5th SF survivors into the Kathil Uhlans for the operation.
Fredrick Steiner's mission fails to destroy enough of Theodore's supplies but his own surrender allows his soldiers to escape. LIC agents take out Combine jumpships.
Morgan Hasek-Davion carries out the raid on Sian, the advanced myomers used by Capellan defenders instead a crippling weakness.
Hanse Davion defends NAIS from a surprise attack by faux-Death Commandos.
Justin and Candace rescue Alexei from the cells - Justin admits he knew Alexei was a fellow MIIO agent. Justin convinces Redburn of his sincerity and they escape.
Melissa's pregnancy is announced on Tharkad and New Avalon. On both worlds, the heroes are honoured. Max goes insane.
Notes: again, relatively few changes here. Morgan being on Kathil being a forward command post just makes more sense with an Interdiction, otherwise his rush there is less plausible I think.