(With apologies to the Pogues)
On the Fourth of July, 3006
We set sail from the sweet cove of Cork
We were sailing away with a cargo of bricks
For the Grand City Hall on York
'Twas a wonderful craft
She was rigged fore and aft
And oh, how the solar wind drove her
She stood several klicks
She had twenty seven DropShips
And they called her The Irish Rover
We had one million bags of the best Sarna rags
We had two million barrels of stone
We had three million sides of old blind branth's hides
We had four million barrels of bones
We had five million hogs
And six million dogs
Seven million barrels of porter
We had eight million bails of old tabiranths' tails
In the hold of the Irish Rover
There was awl Mickey Coote
Who played hard on his flute
When the ladies lined up for a set
He was tootin' with skill
For each sparkling quadrille
Though the dancers were fluther'd and bet
With his smart witty talk
He was ****** of the walk
And he rolled the dames under and over
They all knew at a glance
When he took up his stance
That he sailed in The Irish Rover
There was Barney McGee
From the world Timbiqui
There was Hogan from planet Tyrone
There was Johnny McGurk
Who was scared stiff of work
And a man from Alphard called Malone
There was Slugger O'Toole
Who was drunk as a rule
And Fighting Bill Treacy from Dover
And your man, Mick MacCann
From New Samarkand
Was the skipper of the Irish Rover
For a sailor it's always a bother in life
It's so lonesome by night and by day
'Til he launch for a world and a charming young girl
Who will melt all his troubles away
All the noise and the rout
Swollen poitín and stout
For him soon the torment's over
Of the love of a maid he's never afraid
And old sot from the Irish Rover
We had sailed seven years
When Brisbane virus broke out
And the ship lost its way in the void
And that whale of a crew
Was reduced down to two
Just myself and the Captain's old dog
Then the ship struck a rock
Oh Lord! what a shock
The bulkhead was turned right over
Turned nine times in place
And the poor old dog was spaced
I'm the last of The Irish Rover
