Get out your salt - Fletch's conspiracy theory #37

[cold1]

Here's my new theory...
The 4 homeclans invade
Cloud Adder, Stone Lion, Coyote, and Sphinx Raptor (it's a real thing in Battletech made up of the Adder aggressors).
As they fight through the sphere to Terra the Sea Foxes are the only unaffected entity as they move their aimags to unknown locations.
Upon landing on Terra the Lions announce they are indeed Stone's Lions. 
They are then whacked by Clan Sea Fox who has secretly never left the grand council and has been Dragoons 2.0 bigger and Foxier

[jklantern]

Here's my new theory...
The 4 homeclans invade
Cloud Adder, Stone Lion, Coyote, and Sphinx Raptor (it's a real thing in Battletech made up of the Adder aggressors).
As they fight through the sphere to Terra the Sea Foxes are the only unaffected entity as they move their aimags to unknown locations.
Upon landing on Terra the Lions announce they are indeed Stone's Lions. 
They are then whacked by Clan Sea Fox who has secretly never left the grand council and has been Dragoons 2.0 bigger and Foxier

EDITED BECAUSE I'M A FREAKING MORON.

I like this theory.  I'm glad to be a part of it.

[rebs]

EDITED BECAUSE I'M A FREAKING MORON.

I like this theory.  I'm glad to be a part of it.

Editing is a strong sign of a conscientious poster.  O0  And also that one has nothing better to think about  O0 O0

Thank you, Natasha Kerensky - the fictional character, not the poster!  Because of you and your famous line about those who cling to formal ritual, I always had the prime component of a smartassed answer ready to launch against every smartassed comment I've heard uttered since reading the BoK series way back in high school during the 90s.  Take a Natasha K line, add in situational coloring, and - boom - instant classic comebacks. 

Here's my new theory...
The 4 homeclans invade
Cloud Adder, Stone Lion, Coyote, and Sphinx Raptor (it's a real thing in Battletech made up of the Adder aggressors).
As they fight through the sphere to Terra the Sea Foxes are the only unaffected entity as they move their aimags to unknown locations.
Upon landing on Terra the Lions announce they are indeed Stone's Lions. 
They are then whacked by Clan Sea Fox who has secretly never left the grand council and has been Dragoons 2.0 bigger and Foxier

Sea Fox is set up in all kinds of ways. 

1) Selling ammo and replacement parts to all factions fighting the Home Clan aggression.

2) They will be selling pizzas to all interested onlookers. 

2) Selling various-sized boxes, clear tape, emergency blankets and candles, and YOU ARE HERE maps to refugees.

4) The Sea Foxes are so spread out that not even the deepest spy can discern our disposition of forces, nor can the wise make plans against us.  ^-^  The Sea Foxes don't need the Capellans as allies when their basic doctrine concerning the Art of War is in such concordance with that of the Real Sun-Tzu. 

5)No one ever said cookies are off the table.

6) Trying on those Davion White Hats (TM) might cause issues that go to their head.  Seriously, Davion White Hats are one of only a few very special things in this game universe worse than the Brain Slugs.  And our beloved Shark Foxes dive straight in and go directly to the yellow part of the map where they can easily obtain them.  Not a good sign, but we'll see what they do when they get the keys to the fiat.

[cold1]

There was a lot of talk about Adders strutting around in Davion white hats in the build up to Wars of Reaving.  Then B. Rome was all like, nah dude.  The Davions are the good guys.  The Adders are the less bad guys.

I think the Foxes are going to end up far from white hat

[rebs]

I think the Foxes are going to end up far from white hat

Fingers crossed.

[Fletch]

It's not the white hats I worry about but the guys with the brown stains in there pants.

[rebs]

It's not the white hats I worry about but the guys with the brown stains in there pants.

The Terrans?

[jklantern]

The Terrans?

Certainly ain't Skye.  They don't wear pants.

[cold1]

The Terrans?

The first inner sphere captain to watch a Lev Prime jump into system?  Only to try and change drawers and get caught pantless when the second one shows up?

[rebs]

The first inner sphere captain to watch a Lev Prime jump into system?  Only to try and change drawers and get caught pantless when the second one shows up?

That's the one.  And repainting is out of the question for the duration of the crisis. 

Just as planned!   ^-^

Certainly ain't Skye.  They don't wear pants.

Don't some of the citizens wear pants, and they snootily look down upon those who refuse?  I thought that was more of the dynamic in play. 

You know, that, but also while the wearers of kilts or other fine garments laugh at the childishness of trousers, bloomers, knickers, codpieces and tights, as we know all Lyran nobility to universally wear.

[cold1]

Pretty sure naval ppc's will clean up the mess just fine.  It will help that the dirty drawers will likely be floating freely in orbit soon after.

Anyone want to be the fire breathing, nearly Hellion fierce, Nova driving khan of the Sphinx Raptors???  C'mon rebs, you know you hate the taint the most!

[rebs]

Aye. 

The Taint nearly destroyed the Home Clans through its chosen vessel, the Clan Steel Viper, the pardoxophrenic Reavers and Bearers of the Great Taint.

No taint here, now.  ;) The Adders perhaps understand best now that all Clans are tainted, and were so from the start.  They perhaps they could be interpreted to have increasingly embraced that realization.  Secretly, of course. 

Because it is most certainly true.  How can Clan Calculated Generational Strategy not have noticed, I sometimes wonder.

[jklantern]

Have any of the Home Clans invested in Omni-Goat Cavalry?  Because I think it's a field that needs to be investigated.  It will totally revolutionize Clan Warfare.

[rebs]

Hell's Horses' scientists procured all copies of OmniGoat schematics in the Home Worlds prior to the final convoy departures, and took them to the IS.  But not before the Adders were able to trial for one of the documents.

So, not sure. 

[cold1]

Here's a thought.  A more refined and dialed in feralize...for Elementals.
Have the suit be able to administer it on command mid-battle.

Conventional infantry no longer matters.

[cold1]

Mentions of mysterious forces in Ben Rome 3150 Twitter tease

The Cloud Adder is coiled and ready!!!

Fletch hope you got your Quadvee's ready

[rebs]

My spies report that the Cloud Adders will hit all diaper production facilities first.  Largely due to something we said on this thread.

We're SOL, gents.  But quadvees sound fun.

[rebs]

The Abomination.

Just wanted to toss that one onto the fire and watch it crackle and spit. 

[Fletch]

Looks like the Falcon's are going to have a party ...  >:(

[cold1]

Uh yeah, it looks like the Falcons and Wolves are going spheroid stomping.  And the Horses are doing stuff too, Fletch!  Wonder what they'll find on Star's End???

Didn't see too much Bear stuff.  I find it really odd the Bears's have been so uninvolved in major story outside occasionally messing with the Dracs.  Something brewing there?

[rebs]

I bet on a multi-Clan/Combine showcase showdown. 

Not like I'm picking lotto winners here, this is a game of war, after all. 

Plus everyone in BT traditionally has issues with most of their neighbors.  Keeps the history moving forward in this game universe, and occasionally sideways or backwards.

[Fletch]

All I can safely say is there is going to be much destruction and disappointment. 

[cold1]

I'd like to see a couple houses bite it.

[Fletch]

Excuse me, but you're biting my butt!

[cold1]

Excuse me, but you're biting my butt!

You foreshadowing the Lions invasion corridor?

[Fletch]

The butt of the innersphere?

[rebs]

You foreshadowing the Lions invasion corridor?

The butt of the innersphere?

...Of course!  The Stoner Lions will be attacking via the Davion outback. 

Makes perfect sense.  Zebra's butt, indeed.   :D

[cold1]

And in the new releases thread Ghostbear said sans Ilclan no new clan stuff in the works for at least a year, maybe, sorta. 

Which I sort of expected to be the case.  Thus my theory the homies are either in the Ilclan or on the sidelines for a good while longer.

[Drewbacca]

Is there, like, a Wacky Clanner Union I need to join?

Yes, but membership duels are pretty reasonable and you have to win a trial of position first.