Get out your salt - Fletch's conspiracy theory #37

[rebs]

I maintain that I am not actually crazy.  Crazy things happen to me on a regular basis, and I merely try to take it in stride.

That's a good approach.  I think of it more like 90% sane.  Which is much better than many people I see on a daily basis in RL.

But there are times when the Hall demands more than 10% insanity.  So for the hell of it I get to stretch that out a bit and play with the numbers  ;) 

Edit: Awesome, top o the page...   Fletch, only you can save us your thread now! 

[jklantern]

That's a good approach.  I think of it more like 90% sane.  Which is much better than many people I see on a daily basis in RL.

But there are times when the Hall demands more than 10% insanity.  So for the hell of it I get to stretch that out a bit and play with the numbers  ;) 

Edit: Awesome, top o the page...   Fletch, only you can save us your thread now!

I'd be so tempted to tell some more of the stories of "JKLantern Coping With Existence," unfortunately most of them probably shouldn't be reprinted in polite company.

[Fletch]

I'd be so tempted to tell some more of the stories of "JKLantern Coping With Existence," unfortunately most of them probably shouldn't be reprinted in polite company.

Could be a comic series.  O0

Edit: Awesome, top o the page...   Fletch, only you can save us your thread now! 

Reb's, I am having trouble saving myself ...  :D :D :D

[jklantern]

Could be a comic series.  O0

Reb's, I am having trouble saving myself ...  :D :D :D

Trust me, cults, prank e-mailing the CIA, siege weapons...all SORTS of bizarre things have happened Jantern Adjacent.

EDIT:  And of course, the reason that my senior year of High School the five mile hike home was a better option than taking the bus.  That's ALWAYS a popular and NSFW story.

[cold1]

Atomic wedgies?

[jklantern]

Atomic wedgies?

That would make for a much more boring story.  Although I did have a friend try to bluff me into believing he was going to slit my throat with a razor one time for nerding too much.  Would've been more convincing if his fingernails were actually, y'know, sharp.

[rebs]

That would definitely raise red flags with me, the lack of sharp nails and/or razors.  Always call that person out for half-hearted promises to a friend with the intent to disappoint!  ;)

Then move on to a comfortable topic that everyone likes, like conspiracy theories. 

[jklantern]

That would definitely raise red flags with me, the lack of sharp nails and/or razors.  Always call that person out for half-hearted promises to a friend with the intent to disappoint!  ;)

Then move on to a comfortable topic that everyone likes, like conspiracy theories.

Any thoughts on how the Brain Slugs are involved?

[rebs]

Reb's, I am having trouble saving myself ...  :D :D :D

You've got to keep trying then.  For the sake of enlightenment, the shining beacon of truth represented by this thread, which will hopefully be followed-up upon at some point. 

Any thoughts on how the Brain Slugs are involved?

Green, gray, sometimes black, but always hungering for an unprotected scalp...

The Burrocks brought them from Tanis all the way to the Ghost Bear Dominion.  We know that, now.   

And we also now know that Brain Slug 0 in the Inner Sphere fed upon the synaptic tissue of many Ghost Bear Techs and Laborers, before it somehow "hopped" from a shorter host onto the head of one Elemental Star Commander, Schlomo of the Stukas.   

Schlomo brought it to Terra.  Damned Blakists!  They must have somehow known before us... somehow.

But how it got into Devlin Stone's cryogenic capsule...   That's where you're supposed to fill us in.  Star Commander told me that, right before his eyes rolled back and his hat fell off, I think it was his hat, fell off, and slithered toward me.  Nice hat.  I picked up that nice hat of Commander's, but then I felt funny, and the lights - the lights.  The Lights. 

And then the skull-breaking headache, mommy...  A smell like formaldehyde and burnt bacon, and then...

Then it's better.  A lot better.

Wait.  I know nothing of any Brain Slug, honorable sir.  But tell me; are they as cuddly as they sound? 

[rebs]

Brain Slugs are not mine.  I can't be writing headcanon about them :D  As you see from above, JKL, it kinda sucks compared to the real story of how the Brain Slug manages to travel the interstellar pathways far and wide.   Responses to the above (if ever there is one) would probably be best in fan fiction.

I can only interpret and flex the story.

If you ever take that one up, tell me.  I'll find a suitable redonkulous fan item of my own to bring to life and likely kill all in one artistic spasm.  Brain Slugs are great but not mine to put through that kind of hell. 

Respect the Brain Slug, for it knows much.  :)

[jklantern]

So, as we know, the Tanite worlds were colonized (eventually) by the Cloud Cobras, one of the primary aero based Clans.

Do you know who else is aero heavy?  The Ravens.  In the course of their dueling for sky supremacy, some of the Tanite Brain Slugs managed to infiltrate Clan Snow Raven.  The Curse of Galedon?  That is all a front.  The Brain Slugs had the Ravens clean house their, so that they could take over.  This causing trouble for the Ravens in the Grand Council was a bonus; eliminate the witnesses.

The Slugs remain in the Tanite Worlds, communicating with their Galedonian brethren, and their Raven Deep Agents.  They are plotting.  And waiting for their opportune moment to strike.

[Fletch]

Back to brainslugs again?  Better have this thread moved back to General Discussion  ::)

[rebs]

But it was at a request.  :)

However, to quote Admiral Ackbar, IT'S A TRAP!!!

Everybody brought their salt to this thread as per your request, Fletch! 

Ambush in the Hall.  The Brain Slugs will need their perfectly radioactive/infected Galedon V womb in which to grow strong after this.

Almost on topic, too.   ;)

[Fletch]

and the question is are the brain slugs allergic to salt?

[cold1]

In 3122 to combat the growing brain slug threat, Clan Coyote developed the ER Heavy Salt Shaker IIC.

It does 3d6 damage to any brain slug
Short range 3
Medium range 6
Long range 9

3 tons
2 crits
18 shots per ton

The brain slug threat quickly faded in the Kerensky Cluster.

[Fletch]

Kerensky Cluster must have some of the best tasting chips ever.

[jklantern]

Kerensky Cluster must have some of the best tasting chips ever.

Don't get a tainted batch, though.  That Prion "Mad Slug Disease" is kind of a pain in the ass.

[cold1]

An unfortunate side effect was hypertension.  Centuries of genetic manipulation kept the mechwarrior and elemental phenotypes mostly safe.  Sadly, aero pilots and proto jocks were heavily effected.  Thus only ground forces are used to combat brain slug hordes.

[jklantern]

An unfortunate side effect was hypertension.  Centuries of genetic manipulation kept the mechwarrior and elemental phenotypes mostly safe.  Sadly, aero pilots and proto jocks were heavily effected.  Thus only ground forces are used to combat brain slug hordes.

Proto-Jocks really get it in the shorts.  Aero Pilots can at least theoretically fly away (until the Slugs metamorphose into their aerial form, colloquially termed "ass-blasters").  Proto jocks can't fly and are thus vulnerable to the Brain Slugs, the Brain Slug Chips, and the ER Heavy Salt Shaker IIC.

[rebs]

Don't get a tainted batch, though.  That Prion "Mad Slug Disease" is kind of a pain in the ass.

That's like when you eat one of the burnt chips, but you realize your mistake when the all-pervasive over the top phuncky taste coats your mouth.  In the Kerensky Cluster, the burnt chip is more or less retroviral, a vector. 

And is "Mad Slug" a pain in the ass, or a pain in the head?  That's one for the Cloisters to debate quietly in private for another century or two. 

edit:

(until the Slugs metamorphose into their aerial form, colloquially termed "ass-blasters")

Strong evidence for posterior pain. 

[jklantern]

That's like when you eat one of the burnt chips, but you realize your mistake when the all-pervasive over the top phuncky taste coats your mouth.  In the Kerensky Cluster, the burnt chip is more or less retroviral, a vector. 

And is "Mad Slug" a pain in the ass, or a pain in the head?  That's one for the Cloisters to debate quietly in private for another century or two. 

edit:

Strong evidence for posterior pain.

Clearly, food technology is superior in the Kerensky Culture, as culinary ******-ups involve Hyperintelligent Gastropods and Reverse Transcriptase.

[rebs]

Clearly, food technology is superior in the Kerensky Culture, as culinary ******-ups involve Hyperintelligent Gastropods and Reverse Transcriptase.

That's part of the secret of Clan Germanium Sea Cucumber; they were so successful that they also also went on to become the only Clan to be perfectly redacted from the records.

[jklantern]

That's part of the secret of WHAT SECRETS, THERE ARE NO SECRETS IN KERENSKY'S GLORIOUS SOCIETY, DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.  AND THERE CERTAINLY WASN'T EVER A CHEF CLAN, AND THEY AREN'T STILL IN THE TANITE WORLDS, BECAUSE THEY NEVER EXISTED IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Lovely weather we're having, eh?

[rebs]

Lovely weather we're having, eh?

It is quite nice, even in RL. 

But it might get a little windy and some April rain.  And there's a chance of ortillery now that the CGSC Belly Dance and Engulf have reportedly jumped in-system at a pirate point somewhere over my house. 

[Fletch]

That's part of the secret of WHAT SECRETS, THERE ARE NO SECRETS IN KERENSKY'S GLORIOUS SOCIETY, DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.  AND THERE CERTAINLY WASN'T EVER A CHEF CLAN, AND THEY AREN'T STILL IN THE TANITE WORLDS, BECAUSE THEY NEVER EXISTED IN THE FIRST PLACE.

So I see Gold has gone up three points!

[cold1]

It is quite nice, even in RL. 

But it might get a little windy and some April rain.  And there's a chance of ortillery now that the CGSC Belly Dance and Engulf have reportedly jumped in-system at a pirate point somewhere over my house.

Meh, we'll bounce the CCA Truscott over there to assist, it's patrolling in the area.  Nothing says get off my lawn like Lev Prime II

[cold1]

In brain slug news...
Is green slime pouring from the host's nose a symptom of infection???

If so the infestation has reached the Inner Sphere and Alaric has brought it to Terra. 
...well not that Alaric, and not Battletech Terra so much as the real world now Terra and my son (named after the Goth not the Wolf)

[jklantern]

In brain slug news...
Is green slime pouring from the host's nose a symptom of infection???

If so the infestation has reached the Inner Sphere and Alaric has brought it to Terra. 
...well not that Alaric, and not Battletech Terra so much as the real world now Terra and my son (named after the Goth not the Wolf)

If it was PURPLE slime, then it would be brain slugs.  Green Slime is the result of science fiction movies.


(Hope he gets better soon!)

[cold1]

Meh, he's fine.  It's allergies.  He's still named correctly. 
Yesterday he jumped a fence at daycare from the 2/3 year old area to the 4 year old area, tackled a 4 year old, screamed "I'm not a slow dump truck" then walked back to the fence and asked to be let back in.
I asked him why he did it and he said "I told the boy it's not nice to call me a slow dump truck". 

More concerned with 7 week old who has a cold at the moment.  Though he appears to be fine too, he's just exceptionally loud all night long. 

Anyone think we can have wild speculation about B. Rome threatening to resign?

[jklantern]

Meh, he's fine.  It's allergies.  He's still named correctly. 
Yesterday he jumped a fence at daycare from the 2/3 year old area to the 4 year old area, tackled a 4 year old, screamed "I'm not a slow dump truck" then walked back to the fence and asked to be let back in.
I asked him why he did it and he said "I told the boy it's not nice to call me a slow dump truck". 

More concerned with 7 week old who has a cold at the moment.  Though he appears to be fine too, he's just exceptionally loud all night long. 

Anyone think we can have wild speculation about B. Rome threatening to resign?

He is resigned to the fact that ilClan is coming out next week, and that team ScorpionAdderCobraHorseFox will be victorious!   :D