Author Topic: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.  (Read 143314 times)

Demon55

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #60 on: 19 January 2012, 12:58:40 »
I cannot allow my unit's Dr. Aikenhead to treat headaches with a sledgehammer.

Weirdo

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #61 on: 19 January 2012, 13:04:53 »
It doesn't matter if the ratings were great. NOBODY is allowed to guest-star on a local cooking show while wearing a battlesuit.
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MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #62 on: 19 January 2012, 13:52:46 »
But I was totally going to teach people how to grill using a Salamander's flamers.
Warning: this post may contain sarcasm.

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Weirdo

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #63 on: 19 January 2012, 14:41:45 »
...you must grill like my father does...
My wife writes books
"Thanks to Megamek, I can finally play BattleTech the way it was meant to be played--pantsless!"   -Neko Bijin
"...finally, giant space panties don't seem so strange." - Whistler
"Damn you, Weirdo... Damn you for being right!" - Paul
"...I was this many years old when I found out that licking a touchscreen in excitement is a bad idea." - JadeHellbringer
"We are the tribal elders. Weirdo is the mushroom specialist." - Worktroll

Hersh67

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #64 on: 19 January 2012, 18:41:47 »
I cannot allow my unit's Dr. Aikenhead to treat headaches with a sledgehammer.

I thought that was the Sledge-O-Matic health care proceedure for Elementals.

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #65 on: 19 January 2012, 19:14:34 »
No, they use sledgehammers to do back adjustments on Elementals, not treat headaches.
Warning: this post may contain sarcasm.

"I think I've just had another near-Rincewind experience," Death, The Color of Magic

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Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #66 on: 20 January 2012, 14:12:12 »
I cannot create a one-woman wail as background music for an atrocity by burning down said woman's house with her extended family locked inside.
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Ghostbear_Gurdel

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #67 on: 21 January 2012, 02:27:43 »
yeah, the acoustics are just way off, and she can never remember the lines....
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MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #68 on: 21 January 2012, 15:01:38 »
I'm not allowed to make a Jinggau pilot named Rob Halford.
Warning: this post may contain sarcasm.

"I think I've just had another near-Rincewind experience," Death, The Color of Magic

"When in doubt, C4." Jamie Hyneman

Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #69 on: 23 January 2012, 19:20:41 »
I cannot attempt to create a totalitarian utopia on a planet after toppling the government.
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StCptMara

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #70 on: 23 January 2012, 20:47:13 »
I cannot attempt to create a totalitarian utopia on a planet after toppling the government.

Well, you can. In fact, you can do it to a whole bunch of worlds! Provided your name is Devlin Stone
"Victory or Debt!"- The Battlecry of Mercenaries everywhere

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Reality and Battletech go hand in hand like a drug induced hallucination and engineering a fusion reactor ;-)

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #71 on: 25 January 2012, 01:40:29 »
I'm not allowed to order my troops to burn a city just because I think the downtown district needs better nighttime illumination.
Warning: this post may contain sarcasm.

"I think I've just had another near-Rincewind experience," Death, The Color of Magic

"When in doubt, C4." Jamie Hyneman

StCptMara

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #72 on: 25 January 2012, 02:23:08 »
I'm not allowed to order my troops to burn a city just because I think the downtown district needs better nighttime illumination.

Of course not! That is what incendiary arrow IVs are for!
"Victory or Debt!"- The Battlecry of Mercenaries everywhere

"Greetings, Mechwarrior! You have been recruited by the Star League to defend the frontier against---Oops, wrong universe" - Unknown SLDF Recruiter

Reality and Battletech go hand in hand like a drug induced hallucination and engineering a fusion reactor ;-)

Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #73 on: 25 January 2012, 17:46:26 »
I cannot use anything derived from an Eargesplitten Loudenboomer.
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Fallen_Raven

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #74 on: 26 January 2012, 23:36:02 »
I can not find my boss in violation of Article ID-10-T.

He honestly didn't get it.
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MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #75 on: 27 January 2012, 00:10:20 »
Well, that joke is a little easier to pick up on if you read it instead of hear it.
Warning: this post may contain sarcasm.

"I think I've just had another near-Rincewind experience," Death, The Color of Magic

"When in doubt, C4." Jamie Hyneman

Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #76 on: 28 January 2012, 19:31:47 »
I cannot use the .50 BMG less lethal rounds again.
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Weirdo

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #77 on: 30 January 2012, 10:36:26 »
VLS is not an authorized method for the delivery of Girl Scouts anymore.
My wife writes books
"Thanks to Megamek, I can finally play BattleTech the way it was meant to be played--pantsless!"   -Neko Bijin
"...finally, giant space panties don't seem so strange." - Whistler
"Damn you, Weirdo... Damn you for being right!" - Paul
"...I was this many years old when I found out that licking a touchscreen in excitement is a bad idea." - JadeHellbringer
"We are the tribal elders. Weirdo is the mushroom specialist." - Worktroll

Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #78 on: 30 January 2012, 16:17:48 »
THV rounds are again off-limits to me.
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Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #79 on: 01 February 2012, 23:59:12 »
I cannot use "Sim Broadway" as theme music for a combat sequence again.
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MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #80 on: 02 February 2012, 00:08:20 »
I'm not allowed to use Davy Crockett rounds for precision strikes against single mechs.
Warning: this post may contain sarcasm.

"I think I've just had another near-Rincewind experience," Death, The Color of Magic

"When in doubt, C4." Jamie Hyneman

Fallen_Raven

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #81 on: 02 February 2012, 23:17:22 »
I cannot load infantry into a bomb bay under the guise of air dropping mines. (The insurance adjusters demand that I be banned from the airfield for life.)
Subtlety is for those who lack a bigger gun.

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wartang

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #82 on: 05 February 2012, 21:53:24 »
Can no longer ask where the top half of the Jenner went... again; nor am I allowed to paint it pink and purple.

wartang

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #83 on: 07 February 2012, 08:19:25 »
Can not fire off all my flares at the enemy right in front of me without warning the rest of my squad first, again.

(MW4 multi player)

Fallen_Raven

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #84 on: 07 February 2012, 12:37:18 »
I am no longer allowed to call the NBC team to the mess hall for tuna casserole night. However the medics are on speed dial.

As a side note, cleaning latrines is not a violation of my rights, and the Red Cross invetigates POW camps not barracks.
Subtlety is for those who lack a bigger gun.

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Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #85 on: 09 February 2012, 21:00:00 »
I cannot use the medics as plaguebearers.
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StCptMara

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #86 on: 10 February 2012, 04:42:00 »
I cannot use the medics as plaguebearers.

*takes notes* Really? It sounds like such a good idea!
"Victory or Debt!"- The Battlecry of Mercenaries everywhere

"Greetings, Mechwarrior! You have been recruited by the Star League to defend the frontier against---Oops, wrong universe" - Unknown SLDF Recruiter

Reality and Battletech go hand in hand like a drug induced hallucination and engineering a fusion reactor ;-)

Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #87 on: 11 February 2012, 10:32:46 »
I cannot cook my meals on the heat shield on one of the weapon squad's GPMGs.
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lonewolfsyndrome

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #88 on: 12 February 2012, 01:01:57 »
Necromancy is frowned upon... even if the cause of death was "friendly fire"


Now recurting for the Crimson Cerberus (MWOnline), Currently allied with the Brown Coats. PM me for details.

Falchion

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Re: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread.
« Reply #89 on: 15 February 2012, 21:35:45 »
I cannot deploy my company's snipers for PR purposes by having them target the local revenue service offices.
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