Author Topic: Future Past: Now with some story.  (Read 32147 times)

Khan Jade Wolf

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #30 on: 10 June 2011, 09:16:08 »
HE he I have 7 Manuscripts on the go! I have been told by people who have read them to publish them.
I am trying hard to get them on the computer to keep them in order!
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Hellfire

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #31 on: 11 June 2011, 11:01:27 »
The story is just starting, but it looks good so far.

Good story so far. Please don't fall into that silly view where ALL BT tech curbstomps 2012 modern day Terran tech.

Yes BT armor is superior, yes they have energy weapons and Terra doesn't, yes they have big honking space ships and Terra don't, but that's all they've got.

Modern Terra has a huge advantage in the performance of their electronics, ballistic weapon ranges and accuracy, superb artillery, and heap tons of over the horizon weapons like cruise missiles. In fact the South Africans have some of the best mobile artillery out there right now.

Plus Terra has plenty of experience dealing with cultist wackjobs  :D
Lol, no.  :D

Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #32 on: 13 June 2011, 16:51:47 »
June 10, 2010
Somewhere in Antarctica
Third Squad, 4th Reconnaissance Commando
Another hour later

After two hours in the craft Jan couldn't help but feel that he was in a nuclear submarine. The corridors were cramped and narrow, with exposed cabling and piping, everywhere he looked there were attempts to save weight and space. After covering two decks, they had only found wreckage, nothing to indicate that the vessel had been crewed at all. Richards suddenly called a halt to their sweep. Walking over to the Trooper, Richards signaled that he had seen a body, and it wasn't moving.

Taking the mouth mirror from him Jan slowly changed the angle of the mirror and saw a pair of legs at the end of the corridor, Richards was right the legs weren't moving. But how to proceed? That had been bothering Jan, he had evidence that the crew of the vessel did write in English, but that didn't mean they spoke it. "Mostert with me, the rest of you make sure you cover us." Two of his men sprinted to the other side of the entrance to the corridor. With possible covering fire from two angles now, Jan set off with is medic tucked right behind him. Both men were trying to walk as stealthily as possible, whilst at the same time looking over every inch of the corridor looking for signs of tripwires and other nasty traps. As the two soldiers rounded the corner, both started to breathe again. Jan turned back to the corridor and signaled for his men to join him, he could see the curious expression on their faces as they approached. Realisation dawned on them as they saw the legs without an adjoining torso. The Medic knelt besides the the legs and donned a pair of surgical gloves over his NBC suit, after a few seconds of probing he turned back to the Staff Sergeant. "Definitely human, Sarge. But it looks like she was cut in half by weapon's fire. You don't see wounds like this on a crash victim..." Mostert trailed off as he realised what he had just said.

Each of the wearied men in his squad raised their weapons again, adrenaline keeping them focused and attentive despite the lack of sleep. Fresh concerns weighed down on Jan, if the crew of this craft had been fighting each other, and possible still were, who would or rather should he side with. "Shit. This is starting to be way above my pay-grade" Jan looked down at the corpse again, and decided in that instant to move on, who ever would do that to a woman deserved no help from Jan and his Recces.

As the Recce team started prowling forward again, Jan started to think towards the possible threat that lay in wait ahead of them. What kind of squad-level weapon could possibly cause the type of wounds that they had seen? A sudden burst of what sounded like automatic fire had the entire team dive for cover, weapons leveled at the closing sound of fire. A young-looking man dove round the nearest corner, before leaning out to shoot down the very same corridor. He turned to continue running only to suddenly stop as he realised six silenced weapons were now pointed at him. The young man had a large gash running down his cheek, and what looked like more than one bullet wound to the chest. He fired another salvo down the corridor before speaking "Denique hos adjuvandum me interficere Fragilis."

Jan had no idea what language the young man had just spoken, and by the silence from his team, Jan knew that none of them understood either. A frown grew across the young man's face, which soon turned to anger as he spoke again "Me desertam Blake" and raised his weapon. Five bullets slammed him straight into the wall, the corpse slid down to the floor, his weapon falling from his fingers. "Secure the body, I am going to see if his adversaries are more affable" Jan ordered. Beast kicked the unfamiliar gun away, and stepped back to let Steyn check the body. 

Jan got as close as possible to the edge of the corridor before shouting "The friend of yours is dead, I hope to hell that you show a tad more restraint..." but only silence answered him. Looking back to his team for guidance, they only gave him a shrug each in reply. Jan sighed as he shouted again "We come in Peace" and waited again for an answer. Seconds passed, and yet only quiet echoed. Jan was about to turn back to turn back to his squad when a weak voice finally answered "Prove it you bastard."

Deciding to take a chance Jan walked into the corridor with his H&K raised above his head, farther down at another corridor junction an older woman stepped out, her weapon still leveled at Jan. As the woman walked towards Jan, he could see a sickish tone to the woman's skin; sweat plastered her hair to her head. "Good idea with the NBC gear, the Blakist bastards pumped some kind of chemical into life support systems soon as we killed the majority of them..." the woman stopped walking as she started coughing, it wracked her entire body. She spat out a mouthful of blood before continuing to walk. "I don't recognize the ranks tabs or unit insignia there soldier, where you from? And you better hope I like your answer, Son" the woman's voice held a certain authority. She expected Jan to obey her . Probably an officer Jan thought.

"Staff Sergeant Jan Du Pre, Third Squad, Fourth Reconnaissance Commando, we are here to render aid, not that you look like you want any aid" Jan tried to keep the defiant tone from his voice but failed miserably. "Fourth Reconnaissance Commando? Never heard of you, you better not be trying to fool me boy, I didn't go all the way to Huntress and back to be shot by a young pup trying to rob my unit. Where are you from? What state?"

Jan wasn't sure if she was confused or deluded from fever, "I am from a country, South Africa, I serve in the South African National Defence Force" Jan's answer seemed to puzzle the woman. "You mean we are on Terra? We weren't near Terra..." the woman coughed again, and spat out more blood.
"Not Terra, this is earth..." Jan trailed off as the woman lowered her weapon, and then dropped to the floor. Running to the her, Jan felt for a pulse, and could barely feel one. "Steyn, get over here, we have a woman down" Jan shouted down the corridor. The young Medic jumped up from the floor where he was examining the corpse, and ran over. Kneeling next to the woman, Steyn started taking vitals, "Sarge, we have to get her some serious medical help, and soon. Her pulse is weak and thready, and she is running a hell of a temperature."

Jan truly hoped he was going to get a promotion for all of this after everything was done. Frowning to himself, Jan pushed away that thought guiltily. "Steyn, you and van Jaarsveld get her down to the bay, radio the Yanks to get an Medical Evac ASAP. Authorisation Foxtrot Pappa Delta. Got that?" The Medic nodded as he started running an IV into the dying woman. Walking back to his squad Jan sent van Jaarsveld to help Steyn, before turning back to the corpse of the young man. It was going to be impossible to sweep the rest of the craft on their own now, Jan decided that they would finish off sweeping this deck, then move down to the bay through which they had entered. A sense of unease settled over Jan as he ordered his squad back into formation, this day would only get longer at this rate. His team started moving off, but a sudden flicker of movement caught his attention, turning back to the corpse Jan stared at it. Richards noticed Jan's reaction and looked down at the corpse next to him.

Shaking his head Jan turned to follow his team, and in that moment, it stood up. Richards barely had time to shout a warning as a blade shot through his chest and out his back. The young trooper fell to the floor as the blade retracted, Jan stood horrified as the corpse started walking towards him, an unearthly glow coming from the corpse's eyes. Words came out of it's mouth "Plennus Fragilis" as the blade extended from it's arm again. A roar came from behind Jan as Beast stepped forward and fired a double burst from his AA-12 into the corpse, ripping flesh apart, and revealing a solid metal ribcage. A sickly smile grew on the corpse's face as it continued forward. In reply Beast opened fire again.

And again.

And again.

The massive automatic shotgun bucked and spat round after round into the walking corpse. First knocking it down to it's knees. Then ripping off a part of it's face. A metal skull now smiled at them. The smile only lasted three more rounds before the skull exploded.

Beast ejected the empty drum magazine, slammed in another, and walked over to the now headless body, and fired another dozen rounds point-blank into the body.

Jan walked over to Richards, and stared into this empty eyes.
« Last Edit: 29 June 2021, 07:14:21 by Centurion03 »

Dave Talley

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #33 on: 13 June 2011, 18:19:31 »
and for a bunch of earthers, the sudden thought
"oh crap, terminator was REAL!"
Resident Smartass since 1998
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Because while the other Great Houses of the Star League thought they were playing chess, House Cameron was playing Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker the entire time.
JA Baker

Khan Jade Wolf

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #34 on: 14 June 2011, 00:54:48 »
Ummm Huh????
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Dragon Cat

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #35 on: 14 June 2011, 07:44:55 »
and for a bunch of earthers, the sudden thought
"oh crap, terminator was REAL!"

Yup getting interesting

An SLDF unit maybe Eridani?  With Blakists aboard
My three main Alternate Timeline with Thanks fan-fiction threads are in the links below. I'm always open to suggestions or additions to be incorporated so if you feel you wish to add something feel free. There's non-canon units, equipment, people, events, erm... Solar Systems spread throughout so please enjoy

https://bg.battletech.com/forums/index.php/topic,20515.0.html - Part 1

https://bg.battletech.com/forums/index.php/topic,52013.0.html - Part 2

https://bg.battletech.com/forums/index.php/topic,79196.0.html - Part 3

Redshirt

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #36 on: 14 June 2011, 07:48:37 »
Ummm Huh????

I believe it something along the lines of:

21st Century Commando, meet 31st Century Manei Domini; 31st Century Manei Domini, meet 21st Century Commando
I am one with the Force, and the Force is with me.

This is a Sham! This is a Mockery! This is a... a... TRAVISHAMOCKERY!!!!!!

Wrong. Utterly and completely wrong. Wrong wrong wrong. You're wrong. You couldn't be more wrong. You're the creamy filling of wrongness in the middle of the wrong donut with brightly colored sprinkles of wrongness on top. You're wrong.

Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #37 on: 14 June 2011, 07:54:11 »
Whew.  ;)

Glad the references there weren't a bit vague. The language that was spoken I just translated using Google Translate, from English to Latin so
you should be able to more or less get a direct translation from that. I have no idea how High Dominus would be constructed using Latin and Greek,
so I stuck to Latin only for now. 

As to the unit the DropShip belongs to, I did leave a hint or two earlier. But I leave that for later.

The last post of the story was a bit longer than I usually do, but I found I could get a bit more meat into the post.
How did it read? Was it a bit too in-depth?
« Last Edit: 14 June 2011, 07:57:57 by Centurion03 »

Dave Talley

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #38 on: 14 June 2011, 09:13:12 »
worked well for me,
although working in a few dutch or afrikaaner terms may make it
a little more obvious they arent americans, I didnt even realize they werent till the gace to face intro with the crew

granted by that point I was thinking,
"hmm, an american group with no smiths, garcias or washingtons??"

DT
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Because while the other Great Houses of the Star League thought they were playing chess, House Cameron was playing Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker the entire time.
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Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #39 on: 14 June 2011, 09:48:06 »
Haha.

I really wanted to throw in a few Afrikaans slang terms, but I think I tried to keep the talking to a minimum, I don't think
you really talk all that much during a CQB situation.

But I am definitely going to be making it a bit more obvious that some of the parts of the story take place in South Africa.

Khan Jade Wolf

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« Reply #40 on: 14 June 2011, 11:07:47 »
Haha.

I really wanted to throw in a few Afrikaans slang terms, but I think I tried to keep the talking to a minimum, I don't think
you really talk all that much during a CQB situation.

But I am definitely going to be making it a bit more obvious that some of the parts of the story take place in South Africa.
From what I know, (not from movies or T V,) hand Signals are used and to a High degree of speach in some cases!
Quote
Ummm Huh?
That was ment as a confused reader wondering what next! With WoB and Comstar!
« Last Edit: 14 June 2011, 11:12:56 by Khan Jade Wolf »
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Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #41 on: 20 June 2011, 08:14:55 »
June 11, 2010
Somewhere in Antarctica
Delta Site


Admiral Michael Mullen stared out over the white snow at the craft dubbed Object Alpha, the simple sight of it had him shivering more than the cold of the Antarctic ever had. Something that the Science geeks had estimated weighed more than 3,000 tons, had traveled from a distant solar system and almost landed on earth. The thing in front of him made even earth's most advanced rockets look like little more than a child's toy. And the contents of the craft... Mullen didn't even want to think about that.

He turned to walk back to the massive tent that had been setup by the United States Navy for the coming briefing, as he lifted the flap he was assaulted by a wave of heat and the smell of too many warms bodies in a small confined space. Around the snack table were clustered officers from more than two dozen different Armed Forces; Mullen could see by their hand movements and loud voices that they were arguing over the advantages and disadvantages of various weapons systems. Almost directly opposite to them were the lead scientists from the most renowned research and development groups from around earth. They looked decidedly uncomfortable in their current environment. Mullen quietly found a seat near the back of the tent, and after getting the attention of his aide, nodded for him to begin the briefing. The entire tent quietened as Mullen's aide - Commander JJ Smith - tapped twice on the microphone connected to the PA system, those around the snack table quickly returned to the proper military decorum as they took their seats. Looking at the scientists taking their assigned seats, Mullen thought that very little in the current situation would cheer them up.

Smith spoke up as the tent quietened "This is the first weekly briefing for Project Prometheus, we will be hearing from the Chief Medical Officer, the lead-scientist and finally an after-action report from the SANDF-led first contact. Doctor Williams, will you please start." A dignified looking naval officer with the four bars and star of a naval captain slowly stood, as he walked the podium he adjusted his glasses and scanned his notes. Before Williams commenced his briefing he cleared his throat loudly, and gazed up at everyone from his notes.

"Good Morning all, during the first contact incident yesterday the teams that investigated the craft yesterday found only seven people still alive. Of those, two have since succumbed to their wounds, whilst the other five remain in a critical condition on board the USS Enterprise. Only one, a female, is suffering from wounds inflicted by a weapon. She suffered what appears to have been at least a 5.56mm gunshot wound to her abdomen, as well as a 7.62mm gunshot wound to the shoulder. The other four are suffering from severe exposure to an unknown weaponised chemical agent. The chemical agent is both odourless and colourless, and when breathed in causes significant damage to the soft lung tissues. All those exposed are under medically-induced coma's and on ventilators. We hope that by minimizing the strain on the lungs they will recover in time." Williams paused again as he shuffled his notes. Mullen could see more than one person had twitched at the mention of the chemical weapon. Most here were professional soldiers, and frowned on the use of what could be considered a coward's weapon.

Williams looked up again as he started talking again "In total, sixty-eight bodies were removed from the craft, most have perished from inhaling the chemical weapon, whilst about a third have numerous gun-shot wounds and what appears to be wounds from large bladed weapons. Everyone removed from the craft is human, identical in every aspect to us. Except for eight of the bodies." with this he activated the large projector showing a number of corpses undergoing autopsies, the projector flicked through a number of photographs, each showing different organs and limbs that had been altered mechanically. The entire room became restless again as murmurs and hushed whispering filled the tent. The Doctor coughed once, restoring some order "I am sure that the scientists will be able to go into more depth, but the level of..." It was obvious to Mullen that the Doctor was struggling with finding an appropriate word "Augmentation was extreme in all of the subjects. Each had a device in the throat which I am sure filters out harmful chemical and biological airborne agents. And seven of the subjects had a layer of armour beneath their skin and muscle as well as more than one type of muscle augmentation." The Doctor picked up his notes from the podium and as he sat down Mullen noticed that he took a rather large sip from a hip flask.

Without prompting one of the leading astronomers and physicists from CERN - Soren Altman - rose to begin his briefing. The scientist shifted nervously, emphasizing his severe bookish looks; the thick glasses did not help with his appearance in the slightest only making him look more like the stereotypical science-nerd. His first few words were fumbled and lost, a Marine sergeant quickly got up to switch on his mike "Thank... Thank you Corporal..." his reply had a few soldiers guffawing and laughing quietly. "It has taken us a few hours, but we have managed to gain full access to the computer systems of the crashed craft and have learned a number of things that had us greatly surprised." More than a few of the soldiers were rolling their eyes at the idea of a scientist being surprised or even excited. Soren seemed oblivious to the noises "By accessing the astrological data we have been able to make a few remarkable discoveries..." he loaded his own images into the projector, the first one showed a stylised top down stellar map. "This is roughly the star systems around our own Sol and earth. Using the data from the crashed craft, we have overlaid their data with our own, we have managed to make this amended stellar map. Our solar system is the central one in gold," while he was speaking he had loaded another stellar map showing a golden star point in the middle. Numerous pulsing red stars and smaller white stars appeared. "The red stars signify systems that have habitable planets and sizable human populations. Our early estimates have two thousand systems with human populations."

The air rushed out of Mullen as he realised what he had just heard. The feeling of disbelief and shock physically fell on him. Looking around he could see similar expressions echoing around the room. An angry tide washed over the room as soldiers started shouting and arguing amongst themselves.

Altman stood fast as a rock amidst the tide the tide of rising anger. The bookish man seemed to grow more confident and happy with himself as those in the tent lost their composure and some came to blows over the scientist's discovery. 
 

 
« Last Edit: 20 June 2011, 08:26:02 by Centurion03 »

Khan Jade Wolf

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #42 on: 20 June 2011, 13:52:03 »
 [notworthy] Keep going though we are not worthy of this good run!
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Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #43 on: 20 June 2011, 18:35:55 »
June 11, 2010
Somewhere in Antarctica
Delta Site

Jan ducked under the tent flap leaving the chaos raging inside. Despite the freezing air Jan took a deep breathe, it felt good to be in the open again. Even if he was already feeling the cold clawing itself into his bones. Noticing the lead-scientist from the briefing Jan walked over; Altman was crouched on an outcropping staring off at Object Alpha. Somehow the scientist looked different to Jan, and after a few seconds he realised Altman wasn't wearing his glasses. The thick glasses were in Altman's hands, he seemed to be playing with them, he looked to lost in thought. Slowly the scientist turned his head towards the young soldier, his piercing blue eyes were far colder than Antarctic winds blowing past Jan; who couldn't help but shiver as the glance turned to a stare.

Neither man blinked.

After a few seconds a grin softened Altman's face, but Jan couldn't help but notice his eyes remained as cold as ever.
"I like you Staff-Sergeant." The words surprised Jan, the man in front of him was completely and utterly different to the one that had briefed him not more than five minutes ago.  The scientist seemed to know what the soldier was thinking; his grin only got bigger.

"You see Sergeant, everyone expects a scientist to be awkward and completely anti-social, incapable of doing anything more than calculations on the board in front of him." Altman paused before he straightened and jumped down from the outcropping, as he landed Jan noticed how he never lost his balance or poise; despite the thick clothing and treacherous footing. "By playing the role of the bumbling scientist, I not only can learn a great about my fellows and those that fund my research, but I can surprise them when the time is needed. And as I am sure you know, a surprised foe, is one that makes mistakes." The scientist seemed to appraise the soldier as he stood next to him. To Jan it felt much like an inspection, like the many he underwent as a young recruit; although Jan doubted that his Drill Instructors were ever this thorough.

Jan silently reached into his pocket and took out a crumpled pack of cigarettes, he offered one to Altman, who accepted graciously. "Sergeant, I didn't take you for a man that smokes, not one who looks after himself like you do." Altman took a deep drag and sighed with pleasure.

Jan dragged on his own cigarette before answering "I wasn't a smoker, a few things have changed in the last few days."

The scientist looked at the young soldier again. Jan managed to hide his shudder this time. "What could happen to a soldier such as yourself that would lead him to change his habits so much?" The question seemed to be rhetorical but Jan answered anyway: "Having a good soldier impaled by a blade from a dead man can have the effect of forcing oneself to re-evaluate ones outlook on life." Jan let an angry tone thicken his voice.

For a moment Jan could swear Altman's eyes softened "Losing a friend is traumatic, but many such trials exist to test us as humans, test us, and make us stronger."
Blowing out some smoke Jan turned to look at the scientist again "Is that why you were so blunt with the news that we aren't alone? Were you testing those men in there?" Jan waved vaguely in the direction of the tent. Altman seemed to laugh at the question.

"Indeed my dear-Sergeant, I needed to know what sort of men were defending the earth. And with a simple statement delivered bluntly I now know." As he finished talking Altman took one last drag before throwing the half-smoked cigarette away. He turned to walk away, but stopped as Jan replied "I had to pull two generals apart who were literally assaulting each other because the one had said that you had just given proof that God does not exist. You just sparked a religious war in that tent."

The scientist looked over his shoulder "I may have done that, but Sergeant, think on this. I just told those men, those tasked with defending all of us, that there are two thousand worlds out there in the universe that have human populations a great deal more advanced than us. Worlds that will want what we have, and that have the power to take whatever they want from us. As a adult might take a sweet from a child. And all those men in there can do is come to blows over religion. Doesn't that bother you in the slightest? Because that my good fellow, scares the shit out of me."

Altman buried his hands deep in his pockets and walked off. Leaving Jan to finish his cigarette alone with this thoughts.

« Last Edit: 21 June 2011, 07:16:54 by Centurion03 »

Khan Jade Wolf

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #44 on: 20 June 2011, 18:58:09 »
You are one deep thinker there dude ! Gratz and don't leave us hang too long!
 [rockon]
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Blacknova

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #45 on: 20 June 2011, 20:50:40 »
Nice stuff so far.  One question: They scientists have cracked the navigation program, what about the Ships log with dates and any onboard library that may contain history books or data?
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Khan Jade Wolf

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #46 on: 20 June 2011, 20:56:48 »
Nice stuff so far.  One question: They scientists have cracked the navigation program, what about the Ships log with dates and any onboard library that may contain history books or data?

DUDE! Oh good lord that would be no good for us here at this time!  }:)
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Blacknova

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #47 on: 21 June 2011, 02:53:47 »
Are you and Centurion03 collaborating on this one?
Dedicated to committing viciously gratuitous bastardy of the first order.

Unofficial LD for 2 seconds - It was a glorious moment!

"They can bring it. We fought off an army of guys who wore 20 pound decorative brass shoulder pauldrons. I'm not afraid of the Disney Land mascot brigade" - MadCapellan, in reference to the Confederation possibly facing the Clans.

Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #48 on: 21 June 2011, 04:09:01 »
At the moment its a solo project. In time perhaps it would be nice to collaborate.

Blacknova, most of the DropShip's database has been cracked, the navigation data just happened to be the first thing Altman looked at. Being a military DropShip it has all sorts of nice things that will teach the Earth Humans a great deal. Having examples to study also helps a lot. I just hope that the people of Earth can get their act together. ;-)

Khan Jade Wolf

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #49 on: 21 June 2011, 10:03:58 »
Are you and Centurion03 collaborating on this one?
No I was meaning (us ) earth in 2011 if that was here now!
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Blacknova

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #50 on: 21 June 2011, 17:35:56 »
I just hope that the people of Earth can get their act together. ;-)

You have been drinking haven't you?
Dedicated to committing viciously gratuitous bastardy of the first order.

Unofficial LD for 2 seconds - It was a glorious moment!

"They can bring it. We fought off an army of guys who wore 20 pound decorative brass shoulder pauldrons. I'm not afraid of the Disney Land mascot brigade" - MadCapellan, in reference to the Confederation possibly facing the Clans.

Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #51 on: 21 June 2011, 18:07:42 »
Hahaha.

I did ask that in a rather ironic sense. Who would do more damage? Manei Domini or the
Americans?

Probably the Yanks...  #P

Blacknova

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #52 on: 21 June 2011, 20:45:58 »
I agree, then the smart people, like Safas, Aussies and Kiwis, would have to come and bail them out.
Dedicated to committing viciously gratuitous bastardy of the first order.

Unofficial LD for 2 seconds - It was a glorious moment!

"They can bring it. We fought off an army of guys who wore 20 pound decorative brass shoulder pauldrons. I'm not afraid of the Disney Land mascot brigade" - MadCapellan, in reference to the Confederation possibly facing the Clans.

Dragon Cat

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #53 on: 22 June 2011, 15:55:34 »
I agree, then the smart people, like Safas, Aussies and Kiwis, would have to come and bail them out.

Add Scots to that list
My three main Alternate Timeline with Thanks fan-fiction threads are in the links below. I'm always open to suggestions or additions to be incorporated so if you feel you wish to add something feel free. There's non-canon units, equipment, people, events, erm... Solar Systems spread throughout so please enjoy

https://bg.battletech.com/forums/index.php/topic,20515.0.html - Part 1

https://bg.battletech.com/forums/index.php/topic,52013.0.html - Part 2

https://bg.battletech.com/forums/index.php/topic,79196.0.html - Part 3

Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #54 on: 26 June 2011, 06:49:39 »
Wow!

1000 views! Thanks to everyone that was taken the time to read my little piece of fiction!

More to come later today.

Neufeld

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #55 on: 03 July 2011, 13:15:45 »
Thanks!

I would appreciate any comments and critique.

Two issues:
- Avoid using real life people. It does not really work well, since there is always the risk that the reader will feel that they are OOC.
- Slow down the pace. It is the journey, not the destination that counts. You could make the story way more interesting by doubling the size of each scene. Reading about your characters discovering things about Battletech is after all the most enjoyable parts.

"Real men and women do not need Terra"
-- Grendel Roberts
"
We will be used to subdue the Capellan Confederation. We will be used to bring the Free Worlds League to heel. We will be used to
hunt bandits and support corrupt rulers and to reinforce the evils of the Inner Sphere that drove our ancestors from it so long ago."
-- Elias Crichell

Knightmare

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #56 on: 07 July 2011, 12:06:38 »
This is pimp. Keep it coming.
BeemerCon Summarized. Knightmare, end of turn: "How come none of my weapons fired?"
Look, dude, when you are a real mechwarrior you don't need to get all dressed up in cooling suits and cool helmets to work on your mech. You just strip down to your 1980s panties and crop top vest and start wrenchin' it.
Yen Lo Wang = David Lo Pan

Centurion03

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #57 on: 13 July 2011, 08:44:33 »
Things have been a bit busy, since I got my first Freelance writing job, but here is the next bit. More tonight.

EDIT: SOP stands for Standard Operating Procedure. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Standard_Operating_Procedure
June 15, 2010
Somewhere in Antarctica
Delta Site


The constant darkness had long ago destroyed any semblance of Jan's internal biorhythms, since arriving in the Antarctic more than five days ago Jan doubted that he had slept for more than eight hours. Copious amounts of caffeine and nicotine allowed him to function in a somewhat normal manner, but Jan could feel the exhaustion try and overwhelm him every time he closed his eyes. The constant howling of the wind wasn't helping either. The few times he had managed to fall asleep he had nightmarish dreams; the walking corpse with the glowing eyes always getting up off the ground and walking towards Jan. Not matter what he used to knock the corpse to the floor. Always whispering "Plennus Fragilis" then smiling, but the smile would grow bigger and bigger until only a smiling metal skull was left. After waking up from that recurring dream Jan seldom felt like trying sleep again.

Jan had taken to walking around the Delta Site until he felt tired enough to try and get some rest. Instead of being drawn to his cold bed each night, he ended up staring at Object Alpha from the very same place he had met the eccentric scientists Altman days ago. Massive spotlights now illuminated the crashed craft, showing the massive damage from the crash, but also almost perfectly silhouetting the massive insignia painted on the side.

A star with a serpent coiled around it.

The SANDF Sergeant started mulling over Altman's words again, wondering how long earth could hide from the rest of the galaxy. The things he had seen in that crashed craft had him in awe and yet at the same time he feared what the craft might do to humanity and earth. A sudden sound had Jan drawing his pistol. Turning to face his attacker he was greeted by a deep laugh. Jan relaxed slightly when he saw it was his heavy weapons specialist, Beast.

"I should shoot you out of principle for sneaking up on me you know" muttered Jan.

The walking slab of muscle winked back at this sergeant "Sarge, with the amount of noise I was making I could have woken up most of the camp."

Jan only grunted in reply as he re-holstered his pistol. The giant black man towered over Jan - despite him being 6' 3" himself - as Beast came to stand next to his Sergeant. Jan sighed loudly as he looked back at Object Alpha, "Beast, we aren't alone..."

The massive black man grunted and shrugged his shoulders.

Eyeballing his companion Jan sighed again "Lets go get something warm to eat, I heard the Yanks flew in a whole damned kitchen." Both men started laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of the American Armed Forces, but neither were about to complain about their first warm meal in days. As the two soldiers walked deeper into the Delta Site, the rings of tents gradually gave way to more permanent prefabricated structures. With Object Alpha massing thousands of tons it been easier to expand the Delta Site and bring the world's best minds to it than even contemplate moving Alpha.

The smells of eggs and bacon frying in oil had Jan literally drooling in hunger, he could already see himself biting down into a bacon and egg sandwich, with the oil and fat dripping down his chin, by the time Jan and Beast neared the kitchen he had literally to stop himself from running. Even the usually dour Beast was looking excited at the prospect of breakfast.

Jan's thoughts of breakfast were interrupted as two Delta Force operators in full kit suddenly stopped, and snapped a perfect parade salute. Jan almost fell over himself trying to stop and salute back, the two operators nodded and continued on past them. It was only as they walked into the kitchen that Jan stopped and turned back to watch the distant special forces troopers. "Beast, I could be wrong here, but SOP has us not saluting outdoors when on deployment, snipers and what not. Last I checked Delta Force has the same SOP." The giant turned to look at the operators as well before grumbling "And K.L. Johnson was black when we played poker two nights ago."

Jan almost cried in disappointment when he realised that he was going to miss breakfast "Beast, get the team together, full combat load. I need to go check on someone."
[url]]http://http://
« Last Edit: 13 July 2011, 11:20:26 by Centurion03 »

Khan Jade Wolf

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #58 on: 13 July 2011, 10:18:52 »
{check, SOP ??? nope that was not the SOP of a black ops} Nicely done!
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Praesto Novastar defendere!

Blacknova

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Re: Future Past: Now with some story.
« Reply #59 on: 13 July 2011, 18:43:45 »
Quote
as Beast came to stand next to his Sergeant. Jan sighed loudly as he looked back at Object Alpha, "Beast, we aren't alone..

I am picturing a certain South African Rugby player, I assume you are as well?
Dedicated to committing viciously gratuitous bastardy of the first order.

Unofficial LD for 2 seconds - It was a glorious moment!

"They can bring it. We fought off an army of guys who wore 20 pound decorative brass shoulder pauldrons. I'm not afraid of the Disney Land mascot brigade" - MadCapellan, in reference to the Confederation possibly facing the Clans.

 

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