Author Topic: Don't spit in your helmet- the return of the "Do Nots" thread. (Read 145745 times)

Maskerade · « **Reply #570 on:** 04 February 2014, 08:34:42 »

Quote from: Fallen_Raven on 03 February 2014, 20:50:03

Despite the conventional wisdom, "close" does not count with nuclear weapons.

Wierdo begs to differ :D

Fallen_Raven · « **Reply #571 on:** 04 February 2014, 12:46:33 »

Being able to justify my actions does not mean they aren't crimes against humanity.

Maskerade · « **Reply #572 on:** 04 February 2014, 15:02:25 »

Quote from: Fallen_Raven on 04 February 2014, 12:46:33

Being able to justify my actions does not mean they aren't crimes against humanity.

If I can justify crimes against humanity, the lawyer profession is forever barred to me.

Pat Payne · « **Reply #573 on:** 04 February 2014, 16:52:42 »

If I suggest a course of action, and I am referred to the Geneva Conventions in reply, the proper response is to rethink my suggestion, and not to yell "Cool! Let's do it!" at the top of my lungs.

No, an Atlas is decidedly NOT an appropriate wine-making tool.

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire · « **Reply #574 on:** 04 February 2014, 22:59:04 »

I'm not allowed to fill the sandbox my neighbor's kids use with kitty litter again.

I'm not entirely certain if the objection was due to the kitty litter, or due to the fact that the kitties had already used it...

GreenDragon · « **Reply #575 on:** 05 February 2014, 02:33:17 »

Quote from: Pat Payne on 04 February 2014, 16:52:42

No, an Atlas is decidedly NOT an appropriate wine-making tool.

What about a Fafnir, recent year's model, and not used in combat?

Maskerade · « **Reply #576 on:** 05 February 2014, 04:52:08 »

One does not take the Rattler Mk II "Out for a spin"

Fallen_Raven · « **Reply #577 on:** 05 February 2014, 12:38:31 »

The Captain's closet does not contain a portal to Narnia, and I can not requisition a scout vehicle to reconoiter it.

I can not get around this rule by issuing questionable coordinates for a land nav course.

I am not authorized to modify the training regimen for new recruits.

I can not institue a draft to accquire personnel in an attempt to secure theoretical interdimensional gateways to allegorical worlds from children's fiction.

All medication is to be accquired from the base commisary, preferably with the advice of a doctor. Private Jenkins is neither.

Pat Payne · « **Reply #578 on:** 05 February 2014, 18:56:21 »

I am forbidden, evermore, from describing the Firestarters and their pilots as "flaming."

Never again will I call Phoenix Hawk pilots "Roy," "Hikaru," "Max," "Hayao," or "Millia" unless those are their actual, given, names.

No Marauder pilot in history has ever been named "Kamujin." I will stop addressing them as such, immediately. Nor will I continue to look for signs of imminent betrayal from them.

It has recently come to my attention that it is poor sportsmanship, no matter how much fun it may be, to use my Atlas to pick up UrbanMechs, Hornets or Imps and go for the "7-10 split."

MrJake · « **Reply #579 on:** 05 February 2014, 23:31:08 »

I cannot claim that I "accidentally" fired on my scout lance's Phoenix Hawk, Stinger, and Wasp because I couldn't see them.

"Copyright Infringement!!!" is not an appropriate battle cry.

Unseen does not mean what I think it means.

Pat Payne · « **Reply #580 on:** 06 February 2014, 18:01:15 »

I have been officially banned from having either a Coat of Many Things or any sort of weapon that causes petrifaction, by the consensus of GMs.

If my Viking character comes across a Cockatrice ever again, he is to ask what the chicken-like creature is before declaring "we eat tonight!" (True story :P)

Quote from: GreenDragon

What about a Fafnir, recent year's model, and not used in combat?

I asked about that, and they also said no, something about wanting grape juice, not grape vapor :D

StCptMara · « **Reply #581 on:** 07 February 2014, 13:23:22 »

The Two-sword using Medusa Paladin(with a Keen Falcata for her bonded weapon) will NOT pop Smite Evil
on the Big Bad Demon in the first round of the fight..she must at least let the other PCs have a chance to try
and hurt the Big Bad Demon. Apparently, killing the Demon in one round of Falcata and short sword strikes
makes the fighter, mage, Bard, Ranger, and Druid feel useless.

In Shadowrun, when I make the Troll Face Social Adept, I will *NOT* talk my way through all situations,
even though that is what I am built for. I will allow the razorboy a chance to cut things occasionally, so
that he doesn't get bored by the game.

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire · « **Reply #582 on:** 07 February 2014, 23:26:44 »

A boss fight with that low of HP? He should have had some minions with him.

wolfgar · « **Reply #583 on:** 08 February 2014, 13:36:54 »

It did, lots of them attacking the town. We the PC's just didn't expect the paladin to freaking crit 3 times out of 4 on the smite strikes.

MrJake · « **Reply #584 on:** 08 February 2014, 17:35:56 »

Quote from: wolfgar on 08 February 2014, 13:36:54

It did, lots of them attacking the town. We the PC's just didn't expect the paladin to freaking crit 3 times out of 4 on the smite strikes.

Meh. Crit happens. O:-)

StCptMara · « **Reply #585 on:** 08 February 2014, 19:13:36 »

Quote from: MrJake on 08 February 2014, 17:35:56

Meh. Crit happens. O:-)

And the Falcata has a 19-20/x3 crit...combine that with the smite evil...and it having a 17-20 range
for being Keen...(Note: it wasn't the actual Boss...it was a mini-boss level demon..the weaker things
around it were being taken care of pretty well, though..it was just...well, the Paladin laid the
cuisinart to it..

Falchion · « **Reply #586 on:** 10 February 2014, 02:36:42 »

There are no forward blast concerns with 'Mech autocannons. I cannot attempt to create and/or weaponize it in any case.

Khymerion · « **Reply #587 on:** 10 February 2014, 06:39:05 »

I am no longer allowed to bring a refrigerated trailer with me on adventures so that I can use my character's medical skills to 'loot the dead'. It's not my fault that the organ grinders pay top dollar.

Maskerade · « **Reply #588 on:** 10 February 2014, 11:12:43 »

Quote from: Khymerion on 10 February 2014, 06:39:05

I am no longer allowed to bring a refrigerated trailer with me on adventures so that I can use my character's medical skills to 'loot the dead'. It's not my fault that the organ grinders pay top dollar.

I am no longer allows to bring organ grinders with me on adventures.

MrJake · « **Reply #589 on:** 10 February 2014, 20:53:08 »

Well, the contract did say "full salvage."

Khymerion · « **Reply #590 on:** 11 February 2014, 03:13:55 »

That's what I thought too. Guess not.

Also, I am no longer allowed to start riots in the streets through the appropriate use of the Psychology skills and a high charisma score nor start the Brotherhood of Nod because I didn't want to pay back taxes.

Pat Payne · « **Reply #591 on:** 11 February 2014, 17:09:13 »

If someone asks me if I am a god, the appropriate answer is always no.

This rule is rescinded if the questioner is Gozer.

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire · « **Reply #592 on:** 15 February 2014, 04:12:37 »

Even if a customer asks the same question four times in a row, receiving the same answer each time ("No"), I'm not allowed to attempt to crack their head open in order to harvest the heavy elements inside.

Molossian Dog IIC · « **Reply #593 on:** 17 February 2014, 05:58:38 »

Insurance fraud caused by mech grade flamers is more difficult than many people think.

Maskerade · « **Reply #594 on:** 17 February 2014, 08:19:45 »

I am not allowed to attempt insurance fraud by mech, dropship or (heaven forbit) warship.

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire · « **Reply #595 on:** 17 February 2014, 12:06:56 »

I'm not allowed to claim that it was double parked as a reason for why I backed over a civilian vehicle with Challenger X.

wolfgar · « **Reply #596 on:** 17 February 2014, 12:20:50 »

Quote from: MoneyLovinOgre4Hire on 17 February 2014, 12:06:56

I'm not allowed to claim that it was double parked as a reason for why I backed over a civilian vehicle with Challenger X.

Especially when the streets are in gridlock causing them all to appear to be double parked.

Maskerade · « **Reply #597 on:** 17 February 2014, 12:38:28 »

"He started it" does not excuse me from stepping on a civilian whilst in my mech.

If I am in quad battle armour, I do not have to chase every cat that I see.

MrJake · « **Reply #598 on:** 17 February 2014, 19:26:25 »

When leading a squad of quads, really long leashes do not count as Command and Control.

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire · « **Reply #599 on:** 18 February 2014, 00:11:11 »

I'm not allowed to attempt to hook a squad of Fenrir or Rottweiler BAs to a dogsled again.