Ngoverse "The Administrator" setting, "The Armada"

[Cannonshop]

[out of story]  Had to post this after Worktroll took  the time to send it to me, because it made me chuckle for like 5 minutes straight.[/out of story]

So accept the rawness, but I thought this might amuse.



The video showed a group of civilians watching a news report of the latest sighting.

"It's so damn inefficient!" one said.

"Von Neumanns? Sounds pretty efficient to me." retorted another.

"But look at the time factor. If it takes billions of individual units to kill a star, you're assuming the 'Zerks get decades or more ininterrupted to culture themselves up. Heck, we can probably take out a dozen seed units with current tech."

The conversation descended into a furball of competing minds.

"Thhey look pretty darned efficient to me - look at their track record!""

"Against non-FTL cultures, mind you."

"You're so clever, how would you kill a star then - efficiently?

"Lots of ways!"

"But?"

"Not quite there yet. Most theoretical starkills revolve around upsetting the core fusion burn. Surprisingly easy, if you have the right tricks."

"Like?"

"Drop a big wormhole in the core, pull corestuff out, collapse. But the size of the wormhole you need is planetary scale, and there's no-where to find enough exotic matter to peg the holes."

"Exotic matter aplenty soon from Nyasa ..."

"Cold. You, not it. And not enough. Mind you, a smaller wormhole system makes a great way to blowtorch planetary surfaces."

"Not big enough. You promised me stardeath tech, I demand stardeath tech!"

"So go the other way. Pop enough energy in the fusing core to destabilise it, cause core collapse. Which needs energy density out the wazoo, but the smart money goes on Hawking black holes."

"What about stacked quark shells Pentanomic config, using supersymmetry breaks? Seen some figures on potential there. Kilo-wazoos, if you care enough to pay to play."

"Throw me the stats." Pause. "Hmmm ... yup, exponent looks right order of magnitude, WAG. But where to find'em, how to hold'em?"

"Check your Black Box theory. Bozhem's analysis shows it's pulling quark strings. Pump up the volume, pull out the gluon bags, and Blake's your uncle. There was some publication on it ten years ago out of, oh crap, Terra, but ... they went quiet."

"Okay, so you can pull quarks. How to stack the shells, keep'em from going spont? Even a quark fizzle is going to hurt, just not on a stellar scale."

"You know, is being easiest part. Now."

"Spill!"

"You is knowing of source of negative ene-"

"You madman! Exotic matter! Sure, you could use that to -"

"So then you got two issues. How do you get this into the core, and how do you blow it efficiently?"

"Blowing is the easy part. Assuming you can get it into the core - and my gut feel - "

"You're the one for gut feels!"

"I resemble that comment! But my gut feel is if you can get the shell assembly into the core - "

"And close is good enough; in fact, on the edge of the fusion region may be better. Blue-sky, you're going to get a Type IIpec outcome."

"Type two what?"

"Supernova, type 2, peculiar. They happen. Lower luminosity, slower light curve. They happen.

"As I was trying to say, get the shell into the core and the pressure there is going to provide more than adequate initial containment. I mean, how long are we talking about needing for the shell to disassemble? Millishakes? Plank times?"

"Now you're being ridiculous. Longer than Plank times, surely! And you just highlighted your big problem. How do you get the shell stack into the core of a frikkin'sun? White Sharks aren't going to cut the mustard there."

"Jump it in?"

"I do not want to try moving a shell stack via hyperspace. It would be ... bad."

"Define bad, Egon!"

"Shame, sounded like we might have been onto something."

"Ah well ..."

"Ummm."

Long pause.

"Okay, clam, open up. What brilliant idea did you just have."

"Well, remember that the Alcubierre system doesn't go through space, it takes it's [/i]metric[/i] through space. Which means inside the bubble, you're cut off from the outside universe frame of reference until ..."

"So you mean, stand 5 light minutes off, warm the shell stack, set the drive for 5C/60 seconds, and ..."

"Kaboom. Star-shattering kaboom, in fact."

"Solves the containment issue to, quiaff?"

"Okay, let's work this."

Two hours of frantic work. Theoretical physicists don't need more than notepads and coffee to do most of their work; the mega-budgets only come in when it's time to cut metal. In the video, the audio track is distorted, and not meaningful. The video is clear, and the team pass through excitement to a sudden existential dread. The audio cuts back in.

"Shit."

"It  ... works."

"So ... what do we do now?"

"You mean? We got to report this! We're in a war with existential replicating berserkers, we need this!"

Slownly. "So the League ... just enters the starkilling business."

Silence.

The video ends.

"Captain-general, this is the last transmission we have received from the Hel science station."

""Captain-general, your orders?"

[Cannonshop]

Harborview Hospital, Unity City, Terra...

"You know, I should send you to the Davie-navy for that stunt, Commander."  Trillian Steiner-Davion was waiting for her when she came out of the coma.

"Mghh?" nasal and throat tubes kept Karen from speaking back.
 
"I have dreamed of a moment where I can make one of you Ngos listen without talking back."  the Archon said brightly, "I ought to thank you for giving me this opportunity...ought to.  I'm not going to.  Good news first-Sharon Ngo's undesecrated body is on the way back to Kowloon.  the first bad news, is that you're stuck here until you can get up and move on your own without assistance." Trillian counted off, "Second bad news, is your ship will be continuing to the relief of the Ninth Division without you, third, is that you have my personal attention after walking into this stupid, obvious trap.  Honestly, it's nice to meet one of your family who doesn't make me feel less intelligent by simply being present."

"Hhmmmph?"

"Your little sister, your mum, your grandfather? your Great-Aunt? your cousin Clarissa? yeah, it's nice to see not all the Ngos are brainiacs.  means there's room for the rest of us.  Now, see this? this is your transfer to Civil Service duty, written by me, signed by me, applies to you, you might be wondering why I yanked you from the comfy confines of the Coast Guard, and not into the Navy, yes? yes, I know you are.  Long term Disability."

"Mmph!"

"Don't give me that, I'm your sovereign.  You're stubborn, you get your hands dirty, you take on challenging tasks...but your tactical sense is about as strong as a lemming and I won't have second-best in the Navy.  You're going to the Lyran Embassy to the NIOPS system, once you're healthy enough to travel again, as a representative of the Commonwealth's interests-that should be sufficient to keep you from pulling another one of these idiotic stunts."

[Niopsian]

You're going to the Lyran Embassy to the NIOPS system, once you're healthy enough to travel again, as a representative of the Commonwealth's interests-that should be sufficient to keep you from pulling another one of these idiotic stunts."

Insert Evil Catbert HR Grin Here  >:D

[Giovanni Blasini]

Because there's absolutely no way she could get into trouble in a planet that specializes in weird science.

[Daryk]

That was pure hilarity... go Trillian!  ;D

[glitterboy2098]

Because there's absolutely no way she could get into trouble in a planet that specializes in weird science.

and who rebuilt an old Cruiser class warship no one knew they had into something that weaponizes weird science..

on the gripping hand, against von nueman beserker units, weird science solutions may well be the most effective.

[Artifex]

Poor Karen, just did what she had to and gave the LIC and other agency the time to resolve the shit-show the Wolves have unleashed on Terra ... and the thanks she gets is this.  :'(

[JA Baker]

and who rebuilt an old Cruiser class warship no one knew they had into something that weaponizes weird science..

on the gripping hand, against von nueman beserker units, weird science solutions may well be the most effective.

To quote Agatha Heterodyne, "FOR SCIENCE!"

[georgiaboy]

Even though Karen is of Clan Stock, she must not have read the brochure for the basic clan rules or etiquette.  ::)

[Cannonshop]

Intermission.

Okay guys, I've hit the end of my ability to produce on this one for a while.  I've been leaving my own self-created fictional work incomplete and it's time to get back to it.  I'm only two years behind on my original plan over there, and I still haven't got anything fit for publication.  I Keep bumping into issues like 'is this really realistic?' (which is damned strange for what amounts to a cheesy superhero universe)..

I'll give you a teaser though;

A technological genius with severe learning disabilities and a 2nd grade reading level.

A mage who suffers painful and sometimes crippling consequences every time he uses his powers.

A person whose existence is doubtful because she doesn't show up on cameras.

an "Invulnerable" immortal whose powers make her suicidal.

An avatar of national pride who doesn't trust the government.

a Speedster who always needs a change of clothes.

and that's the good guys.

I'm not going to discuss the villains until I've got something close to publication, but they're going to include suitably nasty opposition and grossly overpowered psychopaths.

and I haven't been working on it for the last six months and I need to get back to it.

[Euphonium]

Thank you for all the time and effort you've put into this, and good luck with your other writings!

[Red Pins]

Good luck, I'm in the same boat.

[Daryk]

We'll be here when you come back to this... Best of luck with your other project!  :thumbsup:

[Centurion03]

Your project sounds rad!

Thank you for posting your Ngoverse stories, they are amazingly enjoyable, and have really helped me get through the Lockdown here in South Africa.

[EAGLE 7]

Your project sounds interesting, good luck.

[ThePW]

IF your project suddenly makes you millions... I don't think we will mind... well maybe (at that point you can HIRE someone to finish this story)

[DOC_Agren]

Cannonshop, thanks for helping all of us get though the Covid crisis so far, by focusing on Ngo.