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Author Topic: The Curmudgeonly Dank and Unpleasantly Moist Underground Lair of Achoo  (Read 76869 times)

The Mighty ACHOO

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Well.....................I have never seen Vodka run off screaming before.
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

MoparMessiah

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that vodka might be a little young

trboturtle

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Around Wombat, it gets old real quick!  [cheers]

Craig
Author -- "The Lance Killer," "Hikagemono," "Negotiation," "Snipe Hunt," "Groundpounder," "The Clawing," "Salvage," "The Promise," "Reap What You Sow," "Color of Authority," "Family Ties," "The Blood of Man," "End of Message," "Heroes' Bridge," "Kurodenkou," "Thirteen," "My Father's Sword," "Evacuation," "Warrior's Song," "Operation Red Lion," "A Matter of Honor," "State of Grace," "Operation Blue Tiger," "A Warrior's Fear," "Shadow Angels," "Murphy's Method," "End of the Road," (IAMTW 2019 Scribe Award nominee for Best Short Story.) and Tales of the Cracked Canopy: Blind Arrogance.

My Blogs!
Battletech:  http://thebattletechstate.blogspot.com/
Other writings: http://trboturtleswritings.blogspot.com/

Wombat

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[Wombat shrugs and lights a firecracker and leaves it conveniently placed in TrboTurtle's back pocket.]

[...and by "firecracker", he of course means 12megatons of high-grade nitroglycerin with a little sausage left over from lunch.]

**BOOM!!!**
"Remember gweilo, you suck when you are nervous." - James Hong

"Everyone has a plan until you get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage

trboturtle

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[Wombat shrugs and lights a firecracker and leaves it conveniently placed in TrboTurtle's back pocket.]

[...and by "firecracker", he of course means 12megatons of high-grade nitroglycerin with a little sausage left over from lunch.]

**BOOM!!!**

*Cough cough*

Good thing I had that shell upgraded to harden armor. Does anyone else smell sausage?

Craig
Author -- "The Lance Killer," "Hikagemono," "Negotiation," "Snipe Hunt," "Groundpounder," "The Clawing," "Salvage," "The Promise," "Reap What You Sow," "Color of Authority," "Family Ties," "The Blood of Man," "End of Message," "Heroes' Bridge," "Kurodenkou," "Thirteen," "My Father's Sword," "Evacuation," "Warrior's Song," "Operation Red Lion," "A Matter of Honor," "State of Grace," "Operation Blue Tiger," "A Warrior's Fear," "Shadow Angels," "Murphy's Method," "End of the Road," (IAMTW 2019 Scribe Award nominee for Best Short Story.) and Tales of the Cracked Canopy: Blind Arrogance.

My Blogs!
Battletech:  http://thebattletechstate.blogspot.com/
Other writings: http://trboturtleswritings.blogspot.com/

The Mighty ACHOO

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[Achoo pulls himself out of the remains of the abandoned, and not pretty much destroyed lair and surveys the destruction. Debris is still falling, several water mains are ruptured, there is several fires and very little remains intact.]

Well, we were cooking sausages upstairs for lunch.








Upstairs doesn't exist anymore, however.
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

Wombat

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[In the meantime, Wombat sprays TurboTurtle's shell down with a magnetic paint, adds a pole, and slips on some magnetic boots and a sleasy outfit. Wombat begins pole-dancing sideways on TurboTurtles back.]

"Remember gweilo, you suck when you are nervous." - James Hong

"Everyone has a plan until you get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage

The Mighty ACHOO

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[Achoo tunnels back under the debris]
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

Wombat

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"Hey now, you'll miss my grand finale!"
"Remember gweilo, you suck when you are nervous." - James Hong

"Everyone has a plan until you get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage

The Mighty ACHOO

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No thanks. Drop the Grand Piano on somebody else please.
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

ShadowRaven

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I'm not sure what is more disturbing. Wombat's outfit, or the excited look on TT's face....
We are Clan Snow Raven. Masters of the void, and reapers of your souls

befriend (v.): to use mecha-class beam weaponry to inflict grievous bodily harm on a target in the process of proving the validity of your belief system.
— From a post on rpg.net

truetanker

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I really hope something awful happens to you ShadowRaven, I really do.

 O:-)

And I rather watch this than hear about it later. That way I can say I was there!

Throws playmoney on the shell.

TT
Khan, Clan Iron Dolphin
Azeroth Pocketverse
That is, if true tanker doesn't beat me to it. He makes truly evil units.Col.Hengist on 31 May 2013
TT, we know you are the master of nasty  O0 ~ Fletch on 22 June 2013
If I'm attacking you, conventional wisom says to bring 3x your force.  I want extra insurance, so I'll bring 4 for every 1 of what you have :D ~ Tai Dai Cultist on 21 April 2016
Me: Would you rather fight my Epithymía Thanátou from the Whispers of Blake?
Nav_Alpha: That THING... that is horrid
~ Nav_Alpha on 10 October 2016

ShadowRaven

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 >:D
We are Clan Snow Raven. Masters of the void, and reapers of your souls

befriend (v.): to use mecha-class beam weaponry to inflict grievous bodily harm on a target in the process of proving the validity of your belief system.
— From a post on rpg.net

trboturtle

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I'm not sure what is more disturbing. Wombat's outfit, or the excited look on TT's face....

That's not excitement -- that #*$^ pole destroyed my 300' Plasma TV screen when Wombat stuck it into my shell!!!

Craig
Author -- "The Lance Killer," "Hikagemono," "Negotiation," "Snipe Hunt," "Groundpounder," "The Clawing," "Salvage," "The Promise," "Reap What You Sow," "Color of Authority," "Family Ties," "The Blood of Man," "End of Message," "Heroes' Bridge," "Kurodenkou," "Thirteen," "My Father's Sword," "Evacuation," "Warrior's Song," "Operation Red Lion," "A Matter of Honor," "State of Grace," "Operation Blue Tiger," "A Warrior's Fear," "Shadow Angels," "Murphy's Method," "End of the Road," (IAMTW 2019 Scribe Award nominee for Best Short Story.) and Tales of the Cracked Canopy: Blind Arrogance.

My Blogs!
Battletech:  http://thebattletechstate.blogspot.com/
Other writings: http://trboturtleswritings.blogspot.com/

MoparMessiah

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We need some good stripper music

truetanker

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Khan, Clan Iron Dolphin
Azeroth Pocketverse
That is, if true tanker doesn't beat me to it. He makes truly evil units.Col.Hengist on 31 May 2013
TT, we know you are the master of nasty  O0 ~ Fletch on 22 June 2013
If I'm attacking you, conventional wisom says to bring 3x your force.  I want extra insurance, so I'll bring 4 for every 1 of what you have :D ~ Tai Dai Cultist on 21 April 2016
Me: Would you rather fight my Epithymía Thanátou from the Whispers of Blake?
Nav_Alpha: That THING... that is horrid
~ Nav_Alpha on 10 October 2016

The Mighty ACHOO

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I think I will just leave now. Watching Wombat stip off his Wombat suit is.......disturbing.
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

BirdofPrey

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Just do what I do:  Delete your memory of unpleasant events/sights/etc.

The Mighty ACHOO

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My memory is analog, not digital. That does not work. Sorry.
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

BirdofPrey

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Oh right,  analog brains.  Don't worry there are ways of causing analogous effects on squishy analog biologics.  Here drink this, this and this, and take these.
*BoP hands achoo three bottles of alcohol and some pills*

The Mighty ACHOO

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Might work. O0



At least worth the shot!  8)
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

Wombat

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"Hey! No fair, I call dibs...DIBS I SAY!!"

[Wombat, sans-marsupial suit, leaps his widdle naked body sideways into the air and swallows the alcohol and pills like a dog catching a frisbee.]

*gulp*

"Ha! Take that Achoo. In your face. In your fa...."

*THUD*

[Unconsciousbat's eyes turn into little crosses and his tongue rolls out the side of his mouth.]
"Remember gweilo, you suck when you are nervous." - James Hong

"Everyone has a plan until you get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage

truetanker

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* Puts silver dollars on Wombat's eyes. *

He's dead Jim, Dead!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCARADb9asE

TT
Khan, Clan Iron Dolphin
Azeroth Pocketverse
That is, if true tanker doesn't beat me to it. He makes truly evil units.Col.Hengist on 31 May 2013
TT, we know you are the master of nasty  O0 ~ Fletch on 22 June 2013
If I'm attacking you, conventional wisom says to bring 3x your force.  I want extra insurance, so I'll bring 4 for every 1 of what you have :D ~ Tai Dai Cultist on 21 April 2016
Me: Would you rather fight my Epithymía Thanátou from the Whispers of Blake?
Nav_Alpha: That THING... that is horrid
~ Nav_Alpha on 10 October 2016

The Mighty ACHOO

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[Packages up Wombat, completely duct tapes the container closed, and ship's Wombat by UPS to Herb's house.]

Where is the broom and dustpan? I got a big mess to clean up here.
It's OK to disagree with me......I can't force you to be right.

If you are waiting for me to go out of my mind you will have to wait. The exits are not clearly marked.

truetanker

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Herb sends it back.

"Return to sender, address unknown."

TT
Khan, Clan Iron Dolphin
Azeroth Pocketverse
That is, if true tanker doesn't beat me to it. He makes truly evil units.Col.Hengist on 31 May 2013
TT, we know you are the master of nasty  O0 ~ Fletch on 22 June 2013
If I'm attacking you, conventional wisom says to bring 3x your force.  I want extra insurance, so I'll bring 4 for every 1 of what you have :D ~ Tai Dai Cultist on 21 April 2016
Me: Would you rather fight my Epithymía Thanátou from the Whispers of Blake?
Nav_Alpha: That THING... that is horrid
~ Nav_Alpha on 10 October 2016

MoparMessiah

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Luckily we didn't leave a return address on there

Wombat

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[The package is, in the meantime, seen dancing on Broadway on Terra.]

"Remember gweilo, you suck when you are nervous." - James Hong

"Everyone has a plan until you get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage

MoparMessiah

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This reminds me of Michigan J Frog

Wombat

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"Hello my baby...hello my honey...."
"Remember gweilo, you suck when you are nervous." - James Hong

"Everyone has a plan until you get punched in the mouth." - Mike Tyson

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam Savage

ShadowRaven

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~pulls out a comically ovesized shotgun and shoots Mopar~ you had to go there didn't you
We are Clan Snow Raven. Masters of the void, and reapers of your souls

befriend (v.): to use mecha-class beam weaponry to inflict grievous bodily harm on a target in the process of proving the validity of your belief system.
— From a post on rpg.net