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Author Topic: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....  (Read 3515 times)

panzerfaust150

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There's been a lot of crossovers and AUs for our beloved game universe. But suppose, just suppose....a Zombie plague breaks out on all five Sucessor State capitals in 3027? Yes, ASB I know. But I'm wouldn't be writing this for SERIOUS historical introspection. I'd be writing this to have a rollicking good time! I mean I can just see some of the scenes now:

Hanse and Melissa are trapped by a veritable horde of Zombies in a anteroom of the palace on New Avalon. It's looking bleak for our heroes. Melissa's getting pretty pissed with Hanse's shooting, or lack thereof (he's a mechwarrior, not an infantryman). Melissa snags the Federated-Remington Superwingmaster Shotgun off his back and racks the slide. Her game face is on.

"Ok, pusbags, I am not a 'Mechwarrior, but this modern girl learned about protection at an early age!"

<BLAM, BLAM> <Zombies fall like bowling pins>

Hanse looks at his bride to be with a mix of fear and love as she racks the slide of the shotgun, never taking her finger off the trigger. She is a machine, dealing out death to people who were freinds, palace workers, people Hanse had known his entire lifes. They weren't those people any more. They were the dead, walking and hungring for living flesh. And any flesh would do. Titles meant nothing, war records, breeding, all was just dressing on the proverbial table for the walking dead. And Melissa knew it.

As the shotgun clicked empty, she turned it around, and buttstroked the last Zombie, smashing his head into the marble tile of the floor of the palace, staining it a sickly black-reddish ichor for all of time, as the palace staff had turned, well, most of them anyhow. The rest had sensibly made for the hills.

She turned to Hanse, her chest heaving, her eyes burning with hate and elation at being alive. Her forehead and hair slicked with sweat and waves of heat seemed to radiate from her like a battlemech. Her causal court wear was drenched in blood, and was ruined. But Melissa didn't seem to care.

"Mom raised me to be a modern princess, and a modern princess uses protection, all kinds of protection. Got any more shells for this thing?" racking the slide for emphasis as she asked the question.

Hanse stammered in surprise "S-Sure, by the way, the one you smashed into the floor? Was that Dairus?"

Melissa turned and looked down "Nope, Looks like him though. You seen him since this all started?"

It was just then a shrill, unmistakable cry of "MOMMY, DON'T EAT ME!" rang out through the palace.

Hanse and Melissa gave each other a knowing look and said "Speak of the devil" simultaniously as Hanse tossed Melissa a pack of 12 gauge shells.

"Better go save your bedwetting cousin Hanse..he is family." Melissa opined as she speedloaded the shotgun

"Do we have to?" Hanse said as he slid a new magazine in his Mydron with a satisfying CLICK.

"He'll be useful as a decoy. It's not like we have a surplus of those." Melissa answered.

Hanse smiled. Finally, his worthless cousin would perform a useful service to the Suns that didn't involve dumb luck.

 
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Taron Storm

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #1 on: 28 June 2012, 22:31:53 »
Oh God, I would have to play in this campaign.   O0   ;D

lowrolling

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #2 on: 29 June 2012, 00:19:48 »
Can we make sanity rolls as well please? This is hilarious.
May no one ever know less then me......

sandstorm

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #3 on: 29 June 2012, 02:44:26 »
Hmm, simultaneous zombie apocalypses? Wonder who'd have been behind such... :P

Hopw much for a modded Locust, replaces the ML with more MGs... :D
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snakespinner

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #4 on: 29 June 2012, 04:15:55 »
A very funny AU.
Just perfect for a story.
I wish I could get a good grip on reality, then I would choke it.
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Lone-Wolf

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #5 on: 29 June 2012, 09:49:53 »
YES!!!

It seems you have just voluntereed for this story.

But as I am always the one to see the loopholes:

Shall it be a story of jokes (a ka Zombieland) or more sombre?

Are the Zombies intelligent (can drive a Mech) or not?

What prevents a Mechwarrior in a Mech from just squashing one Zombie after another? Can Zombies damage or infect a Mech?

I await your story.

Ajax_Wolf

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #6 on: 29 June 2012, 09:53:40 »
Shall it be a story of jokes (a ka Zombieland) or more sombre?

Darius has shown his posterior, so this question has been answered.
Why does everyone "Fire at Will"? Is he really that bad of a person? And what did he do to make everyone want to shoot him?

If a group of necrophiliacs met a group of zombies, who would do the chasing?

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panzerfaust150

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #7 on: 29 June 2012, 12:48:45 »
Ok, here's the kickoff!



Prologue
The Game's afoot (or another bodypart, or...well, you get the idea!)

  It was a busy day here at Comstar Solid Waste Repository A13514 (Happily destroying the waste of Terra in the fires of Sol since 2900!). Many shipments coming in, many going out. And Adept Frank Hariwell was one overworked Data Management professional. He'd been logging in the shipment of some really nasty stuff over the last two days. Something from some long lost SLDF outpost in the Periphery. Something that was known as Wedelolactone-Mononuclide-Dioxin IV, or by the name stamped on the drums...Trixie.

  He'd typed up all the bills of lading, and they were due to go out on the next disposal dropship as Class I hazardous material (Immediate solar disposal). But Frank made a small mistake of a keystroke...or several actually. His all night fantasy Solaris league was taking it's toll (as well as the wife's protestations about said league). And instead of said material being routed on a well-deserved trip into Sol III's furnace? It was instead treated as Class III material (suitable for resale as industrial solvent). The cans were broken up into sales lots, and the lots prepared for shipments to major subcontractors on the capitals of all 5 Sucessor states. Little did Hariwell know, that that inattentive keystroke would change the face of the Inner Sphere (though when somebody had asked the silly sod about it later, his one word response was "Oops?")

 So what was Trixie? Well, as Comstar frantically went through their most secret archives (after having disposed of Hariwell into Sol III), they came upon an entry in the Star League archives dated 2741. It was sealed by the hand of Kerensky himself. Trixie had been a experiement into preservation of SLDF personnel who had been horribly wounded on the field of battle. Naturally, like all of these sorts of tales, the experiment had gone wrong, very wrong. The entire planet had become contaminated with the Trixie spores as the chemical mutated from something that was a simple chemical spill, to a contagious disease. It altered behavior, DNA, and had the ability to reanimate dead brain tissue..with horrifying results. (You can guess what kind if you're reading this story) The world where all this had taken place, Arkham, was 10 jumps beyond the old Rim World frontier, but there was still the fear that this might get out. Kerensky sent his trusted aide, DeChavieller, "cleanse this blight with fire" (only way to be sure, right?) and DeChavieller did, much to noone's surprise, nuking the entire planet from orbit with an Aegis class cruiser (which leaves one to wonder how in Blake's Blood 20 drums of this stuff survived, right?)

 So, what could Comstar do? The jumpships were privately owned mercantile concerns that changed their registries as often as they could to stay one step ahead of their many creditors. (It was the only folks Comstar could afford to pay to haul this stuff), but if Comstar sent the ComGuard out after said ships, well then? The cat would be out of the bag, wouldn't it? Tiepolo and the rest of the First Circut was horrified. They'd have a month before all hell broke loose they figured, but to reveal Comstar's military strength? Why it might just doom the order? But this mistake might very well have doomed humanity!

  And then, Precentor Dieron, Myondo Waterly (who had spent the meeting filing her nails and checking TMZ on her Comstar issue smartphone, her feet propped up on a compudesk that was a yearly salary of an Adept) said "Um, why are we going to stop this? Comeon guys! If we let this happen? As long as those rubes in the Sucessor States don't find out it was OUR screwup, we can have it all, an end to the Sucession wars? Comstar Uber Alles, the corner office, Hanse Davion as my personal valet...Oops, did I say that?"

 The rest of the First Circut, being the bureaucrats they were, and never ever wanting to take any sort of real risks or responsibility, loved Waterly's plan, ignoring the fact she was a bit power-mad and had lousy taste in entertainment.

  And so, one little screwup by a Comstar Adept began an unlikely chain of events that was to change the face of the Inner Sphere. It was a shame the silly sod didn't live to see it, but that Comstar zero-tolerance policy had made sure his last moments had been spent in a hazardous waste drum drifting towards Sol III with a recorded message from ROM laying out his termination from both Comstar, and this mortal coil.
« Last Edit: 29 June 2012, 15:14:38 by panzerfaust150 »
Quote from: HABEAS
Now now. The C-bill stops here. Everything in BattleTech is my fault.

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ckosacranoid

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #8 on: 30 June 2012, 17:30:48 »
i can now see the scence of the bounty hunter fighting the black widow while the boys from top gear look on as all of a sudden zombie mechs start showing up asking for gyros?

ckosacranoid

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #9 on: 30 June 2012, 17:43:47 »
He could not find an extra round of ammo for his rpg. If he did not find one more round he was going to die a very messy death after being stepped on by a zombie battllemech. Dodgeing a burst from the mg firing at him from the Stinger that had chasing him for past 10 minuites he could not figure out just how he ended up in this place much less this fight. Last week he was at home reading a very good novel and trying to keep his cats from taking over the world. The next thing he knows he is fighting along side people who should not be real from a novel that he read about.
As he ducked behind a wall for cover he noticed a pack of rockets. running over he dove for cover again as a burst of fire comes though the wall. grabbing the first rocket in the pack he slammed it home in the lancher and moved to where he could fire the round off. One thing that went though his mind as he fired it was karma must be a bitch as he fired a mini-nuke round at the stinger taking it out along with most of the next sevral blocks with it.
"I hate when you get sucked into your game and have to find nukes to take out zombie mechs!" yelled Herb Beas as he watched the fires burn the mech and many other zombies.

panzerfaust150

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #10 on: 05 July 2012, 16:10:35 »
Ok, not everyone's a fan. In any case, to answer some questions...

1. No, no zombie mechs...but the Zombies will have ways of dealing with 'Mechs.

2. It's going to be a mix of fast and slow zombies.

Let's just say Trixie is going to have some really nasty effects....really nasty indeed.
Quote from: HABEAS
Now now. The C-bill stops here. Everything in BattleTech is my fault.

I AM BATTLETECH!

sandstorm

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #11 on: 06 July 2012, 02:21:33 »
Hmm, SIlly Bunnies, Trixie is for the Kids? Nah, doesn't work...

Wonder how long until someone manages to haul a sample back to Sol system?
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Tokage

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #12 on: 28 August 2012, 19:03:50 »
Bedwetting? Bloody cheek! ;)
Now listen to me you benighted muckers. We're going to teach you soldiering. The world's noblest profession. When we're done with you, you'll be able to slaughter your enemies like civilized men. - HRH D. Dravot

Dave Talley

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #13 on: 28 August 2012, 21:00:57 »
TAG!
Resident Smartass since 1998
“Toe jam in training”

Because while the other Great Houses of the Star League thought they were playing chess, House Cameron was playing Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker the entire time.
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panzerfaust150

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #14 on: 13 September 2013, 14:13:57 »
Chapter 1:
Where's a good blunt object when you need one?

Hanse Adriaan Davion, First Prince of the Federated Suns, Duke of New Avalon and First Lord of the Star League (Plus all around good guy, because the writers say so!) was happily humming Garry Owen in his palatial shower while listing the to-do's that needed to be accomplished this fine day. Of course, every day was fine in the Federated Suns (because the writers said so! Go with it, I like running jokes and hate puns!)

"Ah, so let's see," as Hanse put his index finger to his temple. "First, clean up the mess in the anteroom, that all night bender with Ardan and Yvonne picking our Solaris Fantasy League draft, then there's raid the Combine, smash the Capellans underfoot, greet Melissa Steiner...wait, OH GOD! Mel's coming today to visit...HOLY HECK! MEL's COMING TO VISIT!" Hanse shouted as his eyes went wide. Melissa Steiner was a well known delicate princess and neat freak, and if she found the elements of Hanse's "special BattleROM collection," especially the parts having to do with Natasha Kerensky lying out, plus the general "bachelor pad" atmosphere of the First Prince's living quarters...Well...it was said she had something of a temper, and a heavy handbag.

Hanse then shook his head "Come on man, you're Hanse Davion. Everybody likes you, except those silly Kuritas and laughable Liaos. Just because they militaristic idiots (pay no attention to the AFFS behind the curtain) doesn't mean your GQ charm can't have her eating out of your hands by dinner! Why I am the George Clooney of the Inner Sphere!" (Because the writers said so!). Hanse deftly turned off the shower and got out, being a bit blinded by soap in his eyes.

Stepping out deftly, he reached for a towel and wiped his eyes off and looked around. On the floor some ten feet in front of him, there were two of his palace servants apparently necking against one of the walls of the bathroom.

"Um, Excuse me? I know these things can sorta, happen, I mean it happens to me all the time! But, really, get a room?" Hanse opined as he lifted a finger.

The female figure, who was in traditional French Maid attire (no, not that kind you guttersnipes!) dropped the male figure in maintenance overalls she had been "kissing" to the floor like a sack of potatoes, his neck had been bitten almost clean through, and blood sprayed all over the gold walls of the bathroom like water from a firehose, and she turned, growling in a tone Hanse would have sworn could never come from a human throat.

Her eyes were deep red, almost brown in some places, and her skin was a sickly green grey, mottled with brown flecks. Her hair had become a stringy, blood-caked mass with bits of flesh and blood hanging from her teeth.

"What the-?" Hanse Davion's mind, usually a focused one, hardened by combat and one not to hesitate under dangerous circumstances, went out the proverbial window. He was familiar with Zombies, hell everybody was. He'd gone through his phase as a teenager, watching horror movies with friends (including the lamentable 2980 remake of Night of the Living Dead) But really? A real Zombie, in his bathroom? This has got to be a bad joke, and all I have is a frigging towel? Hanse's mind screamed Comeon, this is the Federated Suns, We have a Zombie Plan, right?

The Zombie growled again, and lunged, but misjusdged the distance, and went careening into the shower stall behind Hanse as he dove out of the way to his left. She hit the faucet with her head, and there was a sickly crack, as her neck broke. But she popped up like a bloody Wack-a-Mole at a children's arcade. Her head flopped at an unnatural angle and there was that growling again!

"Oh, this is so much easier in the movies.." Hanse muttered as he looked frantically for a blunt object. He spied a light pole, Good as any, let's see if short, nasty and hungry gets there first.

Hanse committed, got into a rugby stance, then ran for the light pole. He got a grip on it just as the zombie did, but Hanse was stronger, and swung hard for the head, he connected..and the skull broke up like a out-of control dropship, showering Hanse Davion in a virtual rain of brown-grey ichor as the Zombie's head came apart.

"Well, that's one."

It had been a while since Hanse had seen a zombie movie though. He'd forgotten the essential lesson from the 2919 remake of Zombieland: Double Tap. The maintenance man chose just that inopportune moment to reanimate, and it was looking for Davion brains with a side of gore.

Hanse knew he wasn't going to make the turn in time before the Zombie was on him, but fortune smiled on Hanse, (because the writers say so) and the door busted in with a cacophony of shattered wood and gilded doorknobs. Melissa Steiner, her dress covered in blood and a gleam in her eye that said Homicidal, but fashion-conscious, calmly put two rounds into the charging zombie from a distance of ten yards. One tagged the creature in the neck, the other drilled right through the back of the skull dropping it at Hanse's feet.

Melissa lowered the pistol and smiled as Hanse stood in shock "A Davion naked and speechless. Wow, the zombie apocalypse does have it's better points. Get dressed Hanse, nobody wants to see you covered in blood in your birthday suit."
« Last Edit: 14 September 2013, 19:33:47 by panzerfaust150 »
Quote from: HABEAS
Now now. The C-bill stops here. Everything in BattleTech is my fault.

I AM BATTLETECH!

snakespinner

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #15 on: 13 September 2013, 19:47:19 »
A zombie in a french maids outfit chasing a naked Hanse Davion.
What more can be said. O0 :D [wildandcrazy] [watch]
I wish I could get a good grip on reality, then I would choke it.
Growing old is inevitable,
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Watching TrueToaster create evil genius, priceless...everything else is just sub-par.

wolfgar

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #16 on: 15 September 2013, 20:51:58 »
what more is there to say?.....MORE MORE MORE
Wolf wins every fight but one, and in that one he dies, his fangs locked on the throat of his opponent.

panzerfaust150

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #17 on: 17 September 2013, 16:07:48 »
Chapter 2, Family, who needs em?

  Janos Marik, Captain General of the Free Worlds League and First Lord of the Star League was trapped in the main conference room of the palace  with the people he most despised. No, not Capellans, though that little "poison dwarf" Max Liao was going to pay for this as soon as he managed to quell this "outbreak of cannibalistic behavior." No, not the Steiners, though he sincerely hoped that this was going on on Tharkad as well, it would serve that old skinflint bat Katrina Steiner right! (Gee Janos, tell you how you really feel). He'd had to sacrifice good and loyal retainers to stay one step ahead of...those things, that used to be his citizens. His people. He wanted to scream, but he knew, it was just the universe kicking him in the shins again. Janos felt so tired from the run the small group had made for their lives, and the blood-encrusted chainsaw wasn't a light burden either, no, sitting in the padded chair was a relief, and it gave him to think about his next move, and what to do about his brood of ingrates and fools.

  Nope, he was stuck with his ingrates of a family. First, there was Duggan. The little schmuck was good at his job being Minister of Trade, but he never met an M-Bill he didn't like. And worse, Janos suspected he wasn't the only Marik enjoying the affections of his mistress, Brownen.

   Then there was Duncan...ah, just like his Unkie Anton, and just as loyal. He also had a small problem in that his little off the cuff remarks to the press tended to get the family in trouble...a lot. Then there was the small issue that in these currently troubled times, Duncan would think nothing of slitting Janos's throat and blaming those things with having killed him. Yes, Duncan was the most dangerous, and yet, the most blinded by his ambition. Like the others in the room would let him get away with it...(Ah, Marik family gatherings, one sees more love and togetherness amongst the Manson family.)

    Then there was Thomas...visiting home from ComStar (good time, for that, huh?) and well, he did exhibit a recent reluctance to get his hands dirty. He shrieked like a girl when a zombie grabbed him..If Brownen hadn't shot the damn thing, the heir to the throne would be zombie kibble by now... and he was so, so naive. Parliament would walk all over him....Wait a second! Zombies, when the hell did I start calling them Zombies?

    But the appellation fit. Hunger for human flesh, check. Little if any social interaction except for moaning and trying to kill everything living, check. Definite skin pallor, check. Yep, they're zombies.  Janos shook his head.

    Speaking of Parliament (Name a Captain-General of the League that had anything GOOD to say about Parliament.), he sincerely hoped the overstuffed fools gave the zombies an all they could eat buffet. He chuckled as he imagined the rotund Speaker attempting to run for his life..Ah, what was the first lesson of that movie? Oh yes, Cardio.

    No, he was stuck in a room with a bunch of idiots bound to get him killed...and he didn't want to die just yet.

    But the squabbling of his children wasn't improving his mood, or his survival chances...

   "Listen people, I have a plan, I say we get all the guns we can and shoot our way out!" Duncan protested, showing the deep thinker he was.

   Thomas simply sulked in the corner, drawing ideas on a napkin for a portable flying machine that needed more parts and materials than they possessed right now.

   Meanwhile, Duggan and Brownen were sharing oft glances where their eyes said it all "Does the old man know?

   No, it was time for Janos to do a little pruning of the family tree. Shame there was only one way out of this sealed, hardened bunker of a conference room. And of course, that way was being pounded relentlessly on by zombies. Not to mention there was only enough emergency rations to last 5 people for a week, but for one? One could last a few months...long enough to last till help arrived. Janos could only hope the provinces would send help...but knowing the sycophants and treasonous slime that ran the provinces, most of them would sing "Ding Dong, Janos is dead." and become independent states, making war on each other before the ink on the announcement about the Captain-General's death was dry (Ah the League, one shout away from a civil war. It's an interstellar Lebanon...).

   And Janos had the perfect tool to do it...as he rubbed the chainsaw suggestively. Some would say Janos had lost his mind, especially considering what he was about to do next...but Janos, Janos simply thought I finally understand why some animals eat their young.

   Janos pulled the starter cord on the chainsaw, and it thundered to life on the first try. None of the others had weapons...the fools. Well, their loss...not his.

   He advanced on the crowd of his "family." The chainsaw was held high, and an evil smirk contrasted the hard eyes on his face. "Hello children.." Janos mused, almost playfully "Daddy's back, and he brought a friend..say hi to Mr. Choppy!" as he fell upon Duncan first.

  The rest of the children scattered, but it did them no good, Duggan however was next, as he simply blubbered on, confessing to every secret account full of ill-gotten gains in an effort to save his worthless hide (Duggan Marik, beg...well, I guess we saw this coming).

  The screams went on for a while and all the while, Janos smiled as he went about his grisly work, humming a popular tune from his youth off-key and not caring who heard.

  After he was done, he threw the still running chainsaw aside, and watched idly as it slowly cut through the opposite wall's false wood panel. He then limped away (Damn Brownen actually kicked me in the shins!) and sat down, fetching a small legal pad and a ballpoint pen from the center of the conference room table.

   He scrawled on the pad simply: "I quit, you can have this mess you ingrates! -Janos"

  As for the zombies, they broke in an hour later, and Janos Marik, the last Captain-General of the Star League offered no resistance, alternating between screaming and laughing as they devoured him like a royal buffet, which, in fact, he was.

  After that, the planet was still, still except for the moaning of the dead.
 

   
« Last Edit: 18 September 2013, 12:28:42 by panzerfaust150 »
Quote from: HABEAS
Now now. The C-bill stops here. Everything in BattleTech is my fault.

I AM BATTLETECH!

Dave Talley

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Re: [Fanfic Proposal] An evil thought just popped into my head....
« Reply #18 on: 17 September 2013, 20:30:58 »
Ah the League, one shout away from a civil war. It's an interstellar Lebanon...

sig worthy
Resident Smartass since 1998
“Toe jam in training”

Because while the other Great Houses of the Star League thought they were playing chess, House Cameron was playing Paradox-Billiards-Vostroyan-Roulette-Fourth Dimensional-Hypercube-Chess-Strip Poker the entire time.
JA Baker

 

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