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Author Topic: Dumbest group you've GMed for  (Read 10718 times)

solmanian

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #30 on: 14 November 2015, 04:15:32 »
Do tell.  :)
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panzerfaust150

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #31 on: 10 August 2016, 15:28:03 »
Hate to necro this..but it's too damn funny not to share:

It was one of my earlier efforts at GMing MechWarrior.

I decided, ok, let's run a small lance-sized Merc lance in the Chaos March. No worries. The group I got together seemed cool, fun, younger but not too insane. They all wanted Firestarters...no big deal..good for killing Cappie guerillas.

Then the stupid starts..I offer several different contracts out there, the one they pick? Security for a forestry operation on Tall Trees. Oh, and did I mention the planetary noble running the operation was cozy with the former FC regime, and had gotten himself into a nasty little conflict with the Zhuang De Guang? Nope? Well, am now. And of course, said noble wants "little collateral damage" (As Archer would say..phrasing). My players did not get the hint..not even when I gave them a counter offer doing anti-infantry work on Caph for the Mariks.

Nope. This contract paid, they said..um, yeah. So, we go to Tall Trees, get the players settled in, and run them through some contacts with the guerillas, who mostly had technical and a lot of SRMs. Easy for the 'Mechs to handle..but while the 'Mechs were on patrol, the guerillas would hit one of the logging camps, and kidnap/kill workers or smash machinery or both. This was really angering the noble, but of course, the patrols had been his idea in the first place.

Well, so the players pull back to the main logging camp where the saw mill is. They are supposedly backed up by some local armor. Like the movie "13 Hours", said locals booked when the guerillas came...and helpfully left their equipment for the guerillas. At this point I was giving the players pointed hints that it was time to grab their employer and run. Nope..they did the one thing they really should not have done. They used their flamers..in the middle of a tinder-dry (it had been a hot summer) virgin forest that was the backbone of the area economy, and the money source of said noble's landhold. An hour later..nothing left but four blackened (but still functional) Firestarters..a barren landscape..and a very, very angry employer.

They did rack up a battalion's worth of guerillas. And, the planetary government of Tall Trees bought up their contract for something more suitable..But that noble never forgot..later on, he hired a company of fast striker mechs to wipe my players out on a contract on Saiph. It was how the game ended, and surprisingly, the players won with some local help. We ended it with the idea of bringing it forward 10 years and doing the adventures of the company..but it was all for naught.
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MrJake

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #32 on: 10 August 2016, 23:00:55 »
During my first trip to Gencon (waaaaaay back when), after getting tickets to the wrong town, propositioned by the perv who gave me a ride to the right one, being awakened in the middle of the night by my luggage floating past my bed in the 18 inches of water that had flooded my room, and a couple of other misadventures, I finally sat down at a big boy table to play some tournament DnD. I was exhausted, broke, and so very, very excited.

We were a chaotic evil party tasked with finding an underground passage into the "Last City of Good," so we could destroy its magic defenses and burn it to the ground. Our first encounter was with a large group of orcs. Our leader ordered an immediate attack. I immediately protested.

"Whoa! Why don't we talk to them first? They may know the way or have other useful information."

"Oh. Okay," replies our fearless leader. "What do you want to let us pass?" he asks their leader.

"A thousand in gold."

Our leader immediately orders an attack.

"Whoa!," I hastily interject. "What's the problem?"

"I don't have a thousand gold pieces."

(At this point, I should have asked how much he had. It did occur to me, but seemed of little importance, so I dismissed it. I really shouldn't have.)

"Well, tell them we'll give them what we have now, and they can have 10,000 when the city falls. Tell them they can have the damned city when we're done with it, if they help us through the tunnels!"

"We don't have the authority to do that."

"So? Lie."

Our leader gets a horrified look on his face.

"We can't just...lie!"

"We're evil! We're chaotic evil! We can do anything we want! It's kinda the definition of chaotic evil. We lie!"

He refuses, but reluctantly agrees to negotiate with the orc chieftain.

At this point, the DM gives a little, sly smile (Oh, do I remember that smile. My players had seen it many times, but this was the first time I'd been in a position to observe it), and says, "Pay me what you think me and my people are worth."

There was maybe a heartbeat of time to change the outcome. Maybe I could have done something. I don't know. It...it happened so fast.

Fearless Leader holds out his hand, opens his fist like he's showing something, and says, "Two copper pieces."

The DM laughed out loud while reaching for the dice, Fearless Leader looked confused ("What?" he said. "It's all I have!"), my forehead hit the tabletop a couple of times, and the totally unnecessary combat began.

Yeah...we didn't advance to the next round.

 
 
« Last Edit: 10 August 2016, 23:07:18 by MrJake »

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #33 on: 10 August 2016, 23:16:49 »
That's why I hate evil parties, they're almost always an excuse to be a dumbass because that's "evil."
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Nuclear-Fridge

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #34 on: 11 December 2017, 07:38:38 »
Oh boy. There was one player in my old MechWarrior RPG campaign who was that suicidal gopher. There's a particular stand-out scene he was involved in... It was during a battle against a bunch of pirates that had a 3025-tech Pillager; a 100 ton assault machine that packed twin AC/20s. He was using a 75-ton Black Knight. He decided to take on the Pillager, mainly for the bragging rights.

So he marched his 'Mech up to 3 hexes range and halted in front of the Pillager. He was getting huge chunks of his 'Mech blown off, the other players were telling him to get out of there and let them hammer the Pillager with their LRMs, but he kept refusing. He was sure to score a critical hit any moment and...

After the battle, there was almost nothing left of the Black Knight above the waist. His pilot, having had to eject, marches up to the unit's Chief Tech and started pestering him to start repair work on his machine first. I can clearly remember the guy's offended look when I - playing the unit's Chief Tech - told him there was no ****ing point. His 'Mech was toast.

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #35 on: 25 December 2017, 16:43:49 »
I GM'ed Paranoia once.

Once.

Half the party did not make it out of the initial briefing room.

As in ran through all of their clones before the briefing was complete.

It was insane.

Yeah ... I knew where this was going when you said you'd GM'd Paranoia. The game is designed to where this is a favorable outcome :)

I never really had "dumb" groups, but some who were varying flavors of insane. One time I was running a group through Castle Greyhawk, and they had had a benefactor who wanted them to retrieve a McGuffin from the famed fortress. I'd played him as "generic upper-class jackass", and one of the PCs decided he was evil and trying to lead them to their deaths. So he went in and assassinated the guy. (I rolled with it and made the guy into a memorable illusionist villain who came back to haunt the party throughout the campaign). This campaign also had one of the most epically hilarious character entrances and exits -- one player whose character had bit the big one wanted to do a tinker gnome, which are from the Forgotten Realms. He gave me a backstory that was just too good to not allow -- his character was trying to perfect the ultimate tomato-soup making machine. He entered with an explosion as one try failed -- and when he wanted to retire the character, we pulled a prank on the other players, by my making sounds of a large number of machine noises, followed by a large KABOOM! The other players, having no idea what was going on, came into a room filled with a burnt spot and a LOT of red liquid. For a time they were mourning the death, until someone decided to investigate the liquid. It was tomato soup.. and pretty good soup too! :D

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #36 on: 25 December 2017, 17:37:57 »
That reminds me of some of the shenanigans my Planescape group got into.

To give you some idea, my character was a tiefling wildmage who's nickname by the rest of the party was "Friendly Fire."
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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #37 on: 31 December 2017, 05:37:21 »
Disclaimer: This story occurred over twenty years ago, so my recollection might be a little gappy. Take whatever’s said here with a grain of salt.

So I had just inherited a MechWarrior 2nd Ed group from another GM somehow. Unfortunately, this GM was… crap, to say the least. Basically he was rather spineless, let the players walk all over him and had handed out copious amounts of loot to them for very little investment on their part. It also didn’t help that he didn’t know the rules very well. Clearly, things were going to change.

I began with a complete reboot of the game; clean slate, new characters, new everything. After a bit of grumbling, I got the new player characters. Two of them were troubling, in that not only were they identical, but they were also rather min-maxed. However, I did dismiss this a little, given that they had opted to only pilot light BattleMechs. Yeah, they’d made their giant kill-bot their dump stat. So that did seem to pass. Or so I thought.

As I was getting ready for the first mission brief, they dropped their bombshell. They were going to use their ‘Mechs to rob a casino, and with the money they got, buy bigger ‘Mechs.

I admit that I didn’t do too much to try to talk them down from it. Rather I accepted it, got out some mapsheets and record sheets and went to work. The other players wisely chose to back out of this, simply because they knew that there was no way this was ending well. After all, stomping through a city and cracking open a casino with a giant kill-bot is pretty grossly illegal, no matter where you are.

Meanwhile, Oceans Two were walking through town, and had attracted a lot of attention from the authorities. After a little bit of skirmishing with infantry and light APCs, the cops called for backup, in the form of two UrbanMechs. At first, the players laughed this off, after all, it was but the humble Urbie. Then one of them took a shot to the head, nearly killing them in a single hit. That changed their tone, leaving them panicking and running.

Player One tried to make a dash for it, only to be shot in the back by an Urbie. This took out his gyro, immobilising his ‘Mech and leaving him completely helpless. Player two, in the meantime, decided that with his newly air-conditioned cockpit, he would be best off getting as far away from the trouble as possible. After all, it would only take another two points of damage to the head to kill him utterly dead.

Unfortunately for him, he instead became a victim of Battletech physics. Player 2 was so afraid of being ventilated that he was willing to run that risk. The inevitable happened, and he skidded and fell, ramming head-first into the side of a building, crushing him to death.

That building, by the way, was the Casino.

So of our two would-be criminal geniuses, one was dead and another was in prison. The other two PCs denied all knowledge of them and their activities, and planned to leave the jailbird behind. Instead, the campaign kind of fell apart, and never even got to what I had planned for Session One.

Not that big a loss, really.
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Black_Knyght

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #38 on: 31 December 2017, 15:54:15 »
In our ongoing CBT/AToW campaigns we had a player (I'll call him "Bob") who'd made a dumb decision, then threw an even dumber tantrum, and ultimately quit when it blew up in his face.

Our GM had us running as part of a low level merc company, and "Bob" was chosen to be our original unit commander. We'd been tasked with hunting down a particularly ruthless and devious group of pirates that had been raiding several LC worlds along the Periphery border. We'd encountered them briefly twice before, but the GM had them cleverly make their escape each time. We finally caught them in a rugged canyon, and quickly discovered our 12 mech were outnumbered by 16 of theirs.

It would've been a tough fight, but we believed we could win it, but then suddenly "Bob" decided to personally challenge the pirate leader to single combat! He offered to let them go if they won, but said they'd have to surrender to us if he won.

EVERYONE thought that "Bob" was insane and that this was a BAD idea but he insisted and pressed his plan with the GM, who let him play it out. "Bob" then agreed to let the pirates withdraw and set a place to square off against the pirate leader.  "Bob" then took his mech ALONE further into the canyon to duel with the pirate leader at the agreed upon place. Role-playing it out we let him go ahead, but we prepared to cover "Bob" as best we could all the same. "Bob" and the pirate leader then squared off, and a few rounds after the duel began ALL of the pirates popped out from hidden positions and opened up on "Bob" simultaneously.

Rather than try to withdraw towards us under covering fire "Bob" chose instead to close with the pirate leader, hoping to take him down and force the pirates to surrender. Despite everything we kept telling "Bob" he insisted they'd honor the agreement if he won. Instead "Bob" got blasted and his mech exploded, killing his character. In the aftermath we took a few more losses, and the pirates managed to escape again having badly bloodied us and killed our leader.

"Bob" got pissed that the pirates "cheated", and that his character had been killed as a result. When the GM offered to let him create a new character as a replacement "Bob" got pissed and in a tantrum packed up and quit the group. He berated the GM for not letting him play out his plan the way HE'd wanted it to go, saying he knew he could beat the pirate if the GM hadn't "cheated".

It sucked losing a player, but ultimately "Bob" wasn't that miss in the end...

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #39 on: 31 December 2017, 16:33:07 »
He sounds kinda like a guy I played D&D 3.5 Edition with years ago.  "Dave" was the king of bad decisions, but the rest of the party would always bail him out.

First of all, he was playing a Wizard/Monk, two classes that don't benefit from multiclassing at all.  He'd started as a Wizard, then switched over to Monk at level 3, robbing himself of a major jump in spellcasting power.  And, of course, this build meant that charisma was the only stat he could afford to have a bad score in, so distributing his points between the other five meant that none of them were actually that high.

So we're at a point where this pirate captain and his crew ambush us: we were trying to cross a bay in a small boat and they showed up at the docks to extort money from us.  We were busy negotiating with them, and doing relatively well since we had a couple of characters with good diplomatic skills in the party.  The GM had also hinted that the dock guards had been alerted and were on their way.  But then "Dave" decides that "negotiations are pointless" and attacks.

He immediately charges the Pirate Captain, and gets shot repeatedly because we were outnumbered almost 3 to 1 and they had crossbows ready and aimed at us.  His AC was just high enough to prevent them from getting too many successful hits in, but then he was surrounded by the pirates.  I was playing a Dwarven Defender and chopped my way through the pirate lines until I was standing next to him, giving us a tactically sound position where we could take on the pirates without being flanked, since our backs were to the boat.  And what does he do at that point?

He jumps back into the boat, leaving me all alone.  Well, I was the toughest and most heavily armored character in the party, so I knuckled down and started chopping away with my axe- wasn't likely to win the fight even with the support of the other characters, but I personally took out about half the pirates and did serious damage to the leader since every time I killed a pirate I used my Cleave feat to get a free hit against him.  Meanwhile, "Dave" spent three rounds cowering in the back of the boat behind the bard, rogue and cleric, ineffectively casting his first level spells.  Then the dock guards arrived and arrested the remaining pirates.

The next week, I saw "Dave" in the local comic book store, and he proceeded to tell me about the previous week's game: the incredible story about how he totally saved the whole party from the evil DM's trap and singlehandedly took on on the pirates without any backup from the rest of the party.

I looked him in the eyes and reminded him that I was one of the players in that game and that the session had consisted of the rest of the party saving his sorry behind in a fight that he'd started then ran and hid from. He turned an interesting shade of purple at that point.
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YingJanshi

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #40 on: 31 December 2017, 16:38:00 »
In our ongoing CBT/AToW campaigns we had a player (I'll call him "Bob") who'd made a dumb decision, then threw an even dumber tantrum, and ultimately quit when it blew up in his face.

Our GM had us running as part of a low level merc company, and "Bob" was chosen to be our original unit commander. We'd been tasked with hunting down a particularly ruthless and devious group of pirates that had been raiding several LC worlds along the Periphery border. We'd encountered them briefly twice before, but the GM had them cleverly make their escape each time. We finally caught them in a rugged canyon, and quickly discovered our 12 mech were outnumbered by 16 of theirs.

It would've been a tough fight, but we believed we could win it, but then suddenly "Bob" decided to personally challenge the pirate leader to single combat! He offered to let them go if they won, but said they'd have to surrender to us if he won.

EVERYONE thought that "Bob" was insane and that this was a BAD idea but he insisted and pressed his plan with the GM, who let him play it out. "Bob" then agreed to let the pirates withdraw and set a place to square off against the pirate leader.  "Bob" then took his mech ALONE further into the canyon to duel with the pirate leader at the agreed upon place. Role-playing it out we let him go ahead, but we prepared to cover "Bob" as best we could all the same. "Bob" and the pirate leader then squared off, and a few rounds after the duel began ALL of the pirates popped out from hidden positions and opened up on "Bob" simultaneously.

Rather than try to withdraw towards us under covering fire "Bob" chose instead to close with the pirate leader, hoping to take him down and force the pirates to surrender. Despite everything we kept telling "Bob" he insisted they'd honor the agreement if he won. Instead "Bob" got blasted and his mech exploded, killing his character. In the aftermath we took a few more losses, and the pirates managed to escape again having badly bloodied us and killed our leader.

"Bob" got pissed that the pirates "cheated", and that his character had been killed as a result. When the GM offered to let him create a new character as a replacement "Bob" got pissed and in a tantrum packed up and quit the group. He berated the GM for not letting him play out his plan the way HE'd wanted it to go, saying he knew he could beat the pirate if the GM hadn't "cheated".

It sucked losing a player, but ultimately "Bob" wasn't that miss in the end...

I...what? Pirates cheat, it's just what they do. I'd have been surprised if the GM hadn't had the pirates cheat. (Actually I was expecting the duel area to be mined or something... :D )

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MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #41 on: 31 December 2017, 16:57:49 »
One wonders what "Bob's" plan would have been in the event that the Pirate Captain showed up in a Daishi or something.
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Black_Knyght

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #42 on: 31 December 2017, 18:08:07 »
Yeah, EVERYBODY thought "Bob"s idea was moronic, but he was ridiculously stubborn about it and felt the pirates would respect a show of force and will. OF COURSE pirates cheat, and they had before when they managed to escape us! "Bob" just couldn't grasp that concept though.

I personally figured they'd mine the area too, or cause an avalanche or something. It wasn't a big shock that they'd somehow chosen to flee down the canyon for a reason, or knew how to conceal themselves in it.
« Last Edit: 31 December 2017, 18:09:41 by Black_Knyght »

MoneyLovinOgre4Hire

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #43 on: 20 August 2019, 15:42:34 »
Well, here's one from the 5th Edition DnD game I was in last year.

We had a guy come in by GM's invitation after the game had been running a few months.  He was going to play a ranger.  Rangers are, unfortunately, one of the weakest classes in 5E, and the group already had a fighter, a barbarian, and a paladin at that point anyway.  Oh well.

The group used the roll 4d6, drop the lowest and reroll any 1s until they're something other than ones method of stat generation.  I'm not sure what this guy did but his ranger ended up with terrible stats.  DEX was his best ability score and it was a 16 after racial modifiers.  The GM flat out told him he could and should reroll his stats, but he refused.

He was playing a human character, and used the default human racial stats (+1 to all ability scores) rather than the variant (the one that gives a free feat).

For gear, he decided that since he was playing an archer, he didn't need good armor or a good melee weapon, so all he had was a longbow, leather armor, and a dagger.

And then there was his choice of specializations.  As I said, he went with archery (not a horrible idea) but he took the Hunter archetype.  Hunter has some decent abilities but it also has some terrible ones.  And without fail he went with the bad ones- at thier level he chose the Horde Breaker ability, which allows you to make a bonus attack against an enemy that's adjacent to an enemy you just attack.  Sounds cool, but it's situational to begin with and decidedly weaker than Colossus Slayer, which gives you bonus damage against an enemy that's at lower than max hitpoints.  The only time that you would want to spread fire out instead of concentrating it is if you have a reasonable expectation of killing both targets in a single blow.  As weak as his character was, this was unsurprisingly not something that was common (except for one hilariously bad time).

So that was character creation.  During the game itself, the player tended to sit sullenly at the end of the table, actively refusing to participate in the game outside of combat.  He never bothered using his spells, instead burning them to uselessly use his Primeval Awareness class power at random times to see if there were any demons around (since we were playing a campaign about fighting giants rather than demons, there never were).  Once we got into combat, he would inevitably wander away from the party to attempt to snipe.  This would have been fine if we had been fighting individual foes, but often we were outnumbered and this would do nothing but put his poorly armored and practically unarmed character into a position where some orcs or goblins or whatever it was we happened to be fighting would notice that he was off by himself, unsupported, and run over to kick his ass.  He'd get rescued, eventually, but this would just serve to fuel his all-too-frequent whining that we hated him and wouldn't let him participate (to be fair, I, at least, had started to hate him by that point, due to him being a whiny, useless lump of a player who refused to do anything).  The GM even gave him some options to either boost his stats to be in line with the rest of the party or roll up a new character.  He refused to do either.

I mentioned above his choosing the underpowered Horde Breaker ability.  There was a grand total of one time when he actually managed to use it to take down multiple enemies a round.  Unfortunately, this was when we were fighting Magmins, which are a type of fire elemental that explodes when they die.  So he was carelessly shooting at the little suckers while they were standing next to other party members and causing more damage to the party that way than the critters themselves were.

The player got invited to a few Battletech games, where he also refused to participate and whined a lot.  The GM promptly asked me to not bring him back, since I'd only brought him as a favor to another player and really hated dealing with him sitting in the back seat of my car and sulking for the entire drive there and back (it was over an hour away).

I quit that game due to issues with some of the way things were being run, but last I heard the same guy was still there, only he'd finally decided to change over to playing a sorcerer.  At 11th level, he is apparently fond of using... Withbolt, a 1st level spell that by that point deals less damage per round than using cantrips would.
« Last Edit: 20 August 2019, 20:16:57 by MoneyLovinOgre4Hire »
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NutritiousSlop

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #44 on: 12 September 2019, 17:30:36 »
This is more of a dumb GM story. 

I was in a small Demon: The Fallen group with a GM and one other guy.  He'd been cagey about setting details, so I read a ton of fluff and felt fluent in the lore of the world.  The other guy essentially played a custom-class anime character.  I played a demon-possessed Gordon Ramsay clone celebrity chef.  The GM didn't exactly like this, as he was planning on having all our characters be on the verge of poverty and needing to use some kind of dimensional translation mechanism he'd made up.  My character's wealth solved a lot of our problems, and the anime character's brawn and fighting abilities solved some other ones.  We had a good two-person team working through his half-baked mysteries. 

The amount of homebrew stuff jammed into an otherwise cohesive game should have been a tip-off.  After 3 months of weekly 6 hour sessions, another player joined our group- he played a demon-possessed homeless librarian.  Unfortunately, that character didn't add all that much. 

We started losing momentum around that time, and I forced the issue with a marathon 10 hour game day.  I made a crock pot full of meatballs and wasn't going to let anyone leave until our GM advanced the story more than what we'd done.  He just never connected any of the dots.  We'd seen New York City consumed by a demonic hurricane, and then the GM got mad at me because my character tried to seek shelter in a strip club off the turnpike where we'd fled.  My character had evolved into someone kind of shallow and gross, so it wasn't inconsistent.  He basically had me get jumped, and it was at that point that I realized how bad we were getting railroaded with no idea where we were going. 

After that, the group fell apart.  The GM prioritized playing in another group (and never even tried to invite us) over continuing the story, so everything went to trash.  The GM later revealed that I should have interrogated a BBEG character that was trying to kill us as he brought the demonic hurricane into NYC instead of punching him out and apparently killing him.  The he revealed that his whole goal was that we uncover that we were in a Matrix-like simulation and that our characters were programs or something like that.  The whole thing was unbearably contrived, and I felt betrayed that we'd sunk this much time into learning and playing a game that he wasn't the real game in the first place.  He railroaded us on homebrew and didn't even tell us that's what he was doing. 

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #45 on: 22 September 2019, 10:26:21 »
Way back when--the one page adventures from the Greyhawk box--the one about hunting the goblins in the grape farm.  So the good aligned party goes up the hill to search the place and happens to see a Faerie dragon flying around helping itself to some ripe grapes.  Party yells attack and starts rolling before I can say " What?!?".  So they miss the little fella.  The dragons stat sheet listed Polymorph  Other as an innate ability.   And its rated NG alignment and listed as friendly so doesnt really want to fight them.   Random roll target-save vs poly- fail save-roll on poly table-repeat-repeat.   Wound up with the mage as an ogre, barbarian as a kobold, thief was an orc, and i think the sorcerer a bugbear(and the only one to make his INT roll).   The ogre smashed the pally flat.  The cleric and ranger wound up killing them all while the bugbear sorcerer promptly ran away    Then died of their own wounds since the cleric was at neg hp and the ranger had no healing .

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #46 on: 24 November 2019, 01:04:19 »
Well, here's one from the 5th Edition DnD game I was in last year.

We had a guy come in by GM's invitation after the game had been running a few months.  He was going to play a ranger.  Rangers are, unfortunately, one of the weakest classes in 5E, and the group already had a fighter, a barbarian, and a paladin at that point anyway.  Oh well.

The group used the roll 4d6, drop the lowest and reroll any 1s until they're something other than ones method of stat generation.  I'm not sure what this guy did but his ranger ended up with terrible stats.  DEX was his best ability score and it was a 16 after racial modifiers.  The GM flat out told him he could and should reroll his stats, but he refused.

He was playing a human character, and used the default human racial stats (+1 to all ability scores) rather than the variant (the one that gives a free feat).

For gear, he decided that since he was playing an archer, he didn't need good armor or a good melee weapon, so all he had was a longbow, leather armor, and a dagger.

And then there was his choice of specializations.  As I said, he went with archery (not a horrible idea) but he took the Hunter archetype.  Hunter has some decent abilities but it also has some terrible ones.  And without fail he went with the bad ones- at thier level he chose the Horde Breaker ability, which allows you to make a bonus attack against an enemy that's adjacent to an enemy you just attack.  Sounds cool, but it's situational to begin with and decidedly weaker than Colossus Slayer, which gives you bonus damage against an enemy that's at lower than max hitpoints.  The only time that you would want to spread fire out instead of concentrating it is if you have a reasonable expectation of killing both targets in a single blow.  As weak as his character was, this was unsurprisingly not something that was common (except for one hilariously bad time).

So that was character creation.  During the game itself, the player tended to sit sullenly at the end of the table, actively refusing to participate in the game outside of combat.  He never bothered using his spells, instead burning them to uselessly use his Primeval Awareness class power at random times to see if there were any demons around (since we were playing a campaign about fighting giants rather than demons, there never were).  Once we got into combat, he would inevitably wander away from the party to attempt to snipe.  This would have been fine if we had been fighting individual foes, but often we were outnumbered and this would do nothing but put his poorly armored and practically unarmed character into a position where some orcs or goblins or whatever it was we happened to be fighting would notice that he was off by himself, unsupported, and run over to kick his ass.  He'd get rescued, eventually, but this would just serve to fuel his all-too-frequent whining that we hated him and wouldn't let him participate (to be fair, I, at least, had started to hate him by that point, due to him being a whiny, useless lump of a player who refused to do anything).  The GM even gave him some options to either boost his stats to be in line with the rest of the party or roll up a new character.  He refused to do either.

I mentioned above his choosing the underpowered Horde Breaker ability.  There was a grand total of one time when he actually managed to use it to take down multiple enemies a round.  Unfortunately, this was when we were fighting Magmins, which are a type of fire elemental that explodes when they die.  So he was carelessly shooting at the little suckers while they were standing next to other party members and causing more damage to the party that way than the critters themselves were.

The player got invited to a few Battletech games, where he also refused to participate and whined a lot.  The GM promptly asked me to not bring him back, since I'd only brought him as a favor to another player and really hated dealing with him sitting in the back seat of my car and sulking for the entire drive there and back (it was over an hour away).

I quit that game due to issues with some of the way things were being run, but last I heard the same guy was still there, only he'd finally decided to change over to playing a sorcerer.  At 11th level, he is apparently fond of using... Withbolt, a 1st level spell that by that point deals less damage per round than using cantrips would.

I recently talked with one of the other people in that party, and apparently shortly after I posted this story the group collectively finally got fed up with the player's passive aggressive refusal to participate in the game and stopped inviting him (wasn't hard, since he didn't have a car they just stopped driving over to pick him up for games).

Anyway, a conversation I once had while GMing: "Yes, technically it is possible to attempt to bluff the wizard into thinking he can't actually cast spells.  Unfortunately for you, that skill check takes several minutes while casting Disintegrate only takes a standard action.  Make a Fortitude save."
Warning: this post may contain sarcasm.

"I think I've just had another near-Rincewind experience," Death, The Color of Magic

DarkSpade

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Re: Dumbest group you've GMed for
« Reply #47 on: 24 November 2019, 11:21:35 »
I've never had a plan stupid group, but I have run for a group that just wouldn't shut up. I was running a shadowrun game based off of Shadowrun Returns. Every time I tried to describe anything, they'd start talking over me.  Naturally, they'd miss out on a lot and get stuck, leaving me to describe the room again just so I could get talked over again.   I should have known it was going to be a huge problem from the first session.  They were supposed to be helping an old friend solve his murder and as such were in the morgue where his body was.  Part of the room description was a police evidence bag laying on a small table next to the gurney.  Having gotten tired or repeating myself, I finally had one of the NPCs say," and make sure that evidence bag gets to the police station before your shift's over," as he left.   One player immediately exclaims, "What evidence bag!? You never said anything about an evidence bag!"   :facepalm:

Okay, maybe one was a little dumb, because later, they got their hands on a crashed plane's black box after getting some hints that their were people out there who wanted it. This was never a part of the plot, or even a red herring.  It was just a way for them to pick up some easy cash mid mission.  One player became obsessed with it and was sure this would break the whole case to the point that he forgot about everything else that happened at the NTSB facility including the actual evidence they had gathered.   Now a more experienced GM may have been able to work this into the story, but this was my first time running and I had no clue how.  Hell, this was so far off course, I don't think I could now.  I decided I had to get this thing away from them.  I did so by having the lady who ran the safe house they stayed at call them into her office.  She chewed them out over doing something so stupid while showing them on the security monitors that her bartender was distracting armed federal agents.  They were told that they could give her the black box and she'd arrange for this whole problem to go away.  If not, she'd still honor their arrangement to protect them in the safe house, but once they stepped outside, they were on their own.  First, the player argued with me for a few minutes about how the black box was tracked.  :facepalm:  Then the players debated what to do for a long time while frequently getting off topic.  They finally came to a decision once they noticed I was playing solitaire on my tablet.

I called the whole campaign after that.  Between constantly getting talked over and the extreme paranoia the characters had about everything, I just wasn't having fun running it.  Funny thing is that in this story, the money reward at the end turns out to be pure bunk.  To make up for it, they players were going to earn several very useful contacts, which is huge in Shadowrun.  At least, they would have if their paranoia hadn't made them disliked by just about everyone they dealt with.
Space Marines are guys who look at a chainsaw and think, “That should be balanced for parrying.”

 

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