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Author Topic: Mech Jokes  (Read 4657 times)

truetanker

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #30 on: 26 September 2018, 17:53:04 »
What Mech get's thrown from all the bars and the ladies room?

The Flashman!

TT
Khan, Clan Iron Dolphin
Azeroth Pocketverse
That is, if true tanker doesn't beat me to it. He makes truly evil units.Col.Hengist on 31 May 2013
TT, we know you are the master of nasty  O0 ~ Fletch on 22 June 2013
If I'm attacking you, conventional wisom says to bring 3x your force.  I want extra insurance, so I'll bring 4 for every 1 of what you have :D ~ Tai Dai Cultist on 21 April 2016
Me: Would you rather fight my Epithymía Thanátou from the Whispers of Blake?
Nav_Alpha: That THING... that is horrid
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ClarkeMarek

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #31 on: 26 September 2018, 18:57:26 »
Spider Mech
Spider Mech
Does whatever the Spider Mech can
Everything's getting dark
"I don't feel good, Mr. Stark!"
Oh no!!!!  :o There goes the Spider Mech!  :o
"Son, if dynamite was dangerous, do you think they'd sell it to an idiot like me?"~Al Bundy
Five rounds, rapid!

truetanker

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  • Clan Hells Horses 666th Mech. Assualt Cluster
Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #32 on: 26 September 2018, 20:30:27 »
Everything's getting dark
"I don't feel good, Mr. Stark!"
Oh no!!!!  :o There goes the Spider Mech!  :o

" Nothing stops the Juggernaut! You shouldn't have enter the ring little spider! MUHawhawhawhaw... "



TT
Khan, Clan Iron Dolphin
Azeroth Pocketverse
That is, if true tanker doesn't beat me to it. He makes truly evil units.Col.Hengist on 31 May 2013
TT, we know you are the master of nasty  O0 ~ Fletch on 22 June 2013
If I'm attacking you, conventional wisom says to bring 3x your force.  I want extra insurance, so I'll bring 4 for every 1 of what you have :D ~ Tai Dai Cultist on 21 April 2016
Me: Would you rather fight my Epithymía Thanátou from the Whispers of Blake?
Nav_Alpha: That THING... that is horrid
~ Nav_Alpha on 10 October 2016

Wrangler

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #33 on: 27 September 2018, 06:31:45 »
Who always wanted by the law and who is always chasing them?

Thug and the Marshal!
"Men, fetch the Urbanmechs.  We have an interrogation to attend to." - jklantern
"How do you defeat a Dragau? Shoot the damn thing. Lots." - Jellico 
"No, it's a "Most Awesome Blues Brothers scene Reenactment EVER" waiting to happen." VotW Destrier - Weirdo  
"It's 200 LY to Sian, we got a full load of shells, a half a platoon of Grenadiers, it's exploding outside, and we're wearing flak jackets." VoTW Destrier - Misterpants

monbvol

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #34 on: 27 September 2018, 13:32:31 »
What mech never gets lost?

The Atlas.

Banzai

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #35 on: 27 September 2018, 14:53:05 »
Spider Mech
Spider Mech
Does whatever the Spider Mech can
Everything's getting dark
"I don't feel good, Mr. Stark!"
Oh no!!!!  :o There goes the Spider Mech!  :o

Too soon!  Too soon!

Demon55

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #36 on: 01 October 2018, 11:09:44 »
Who always wanted by the law and who is always chasing them?

Thug and the Marshal!

I never thought of that one.  Awesome.

Wrangler

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #37 on: 03 October 2018, 08:17:32 »
What do you get when Quickdraw, Gunslinger, a Clint, and Rifleman fight?
Old space Western shoot out!

What do you get when an Enforcer & Clint team up.  A specular new Dirty Harry movie!
"Men, fetch the Urbanmechs.  We have an interrogation to attend to." - jklantern
"How do you defeat a Dragau? Shoot the damn thing. Lots." - Jellico 
"No, it's a "Most Awesome Blues Brothers scene Reenactment EVER" waiting to happen." VotW Destrier - Weirdo  
"It's 200 LY to Sian, we got a full load of shells, a half a platoon of Grenadiers, it's exploding outside, and we're wearing flak jackets." VoTW Destrier - Misterpants

Gigastrike

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #38 on: 03 October 2018, 09:07:37 »
A whitworth walks into a bar.  Its leg falls off.

Banzai

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #39 on: 03 October 2018, 19:43:29 »
A whitworth walks into a bar.  Its leg falls off.

Okay, that one really was funny.

Demon55

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #40 on: 04 October 2018, 19:36:08 »
What do Crabs call King Crabs?

Kings left behind. 

What did the Crabs institute after that?

Crabrocracy.

Wrangler

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #41 on: 05 October 2018, 06:26:00 »
What Mech is most likely to have pilot named Logan? The Wolverine *shink*
"Men, fetch the Urbanmechs.  We have an interrogation to attend to." - jklantern
"How do you defeat a Dragau? Shoot the damn thing. Lots." - Jellico 
"No, it's a "Most Awesome Blues Brothers scene Reenactment EVER" waiting to happen." VotW Destrier - Weirdo  
"It's 200 LY to Sian, we got a full load of shells, a half a platoon of Grenadiers, it's exploding outside, and we're wearing flak jackets." VoTW Destrier - Misterpants

Gigastrike

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #42 on: 12 October 2018, 12:59:43 »
What do you call a one-legged Hussar?

An ejector seat.

FyrstormTheArtist

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #43 on: 29 October 2018, 17:07:02 »
What do you call a UM-R60 that spends all its time in the residential district?

A subUrbanmech.

Gigastrike

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #44 on: 03 December 2018, 09:51:04 »
A call was sent out to all other Clans by a Jade Falcon mechwarrior, who claimed to have made the next major leap in Clan society.  They were to meet on a specified planet with a mech of their choice and a prime example of their Clan's totem animal.  Nothing else was said.

A mechwarrior from Clan Ice Hellion arrived first with an ice hellion perched on her arm to match the bird on the other's.  "What have you called us here for?", she asked.

"I have made a breakthrough in mech combat," said the Jade Falcon mechwarrior.  "It is so simple that I can't believe we've never considered it before.  If we were to simply keep our totem animal with us in our cockpit as we fight, the pride we feel in our Clan would surely cause us to fight with unprecedented ferocity!"

The Ice Hellion mechwarrior looked at her totem animal and smiled.  "I suppose it would.  In fact, I wish to experience this for myself."

"Then we will enter our mechs and engage each other in zellbrigen, and you will come to understand what I now know is the truth."

The two dueled, and with the feeling of closeness to their totem animals fought with unparalleled bravery.  After the mech of the Ice Hellion pilot had its arm destroyed by a well placed particle beam shot, the Jade Falcon pilot offered hegira and it was done.

"That was an incredible duel," admitted the defeated pilot.  "I will recommend this method to the rest of my Clan."

Just then a dropship landed, and a member of Clan Star Adder walked out and addressed the one who called them, "what have we been called for?"

"I was just showing my friend here the satisfaction of fighting with our totem animal by our side.  Do you accept my truth?

The Star Adder mechwarrior looked at the damaged mechs, and then at the Ice Hellion pilot and saw that she was adequately convinced.  "Sounds simple enough.  In fact, my cold-blooded friend might even enjoy the heat of a mech's cockpit."

More dropships began to land.  Cloud Cobra, Snow Raven, Steel Viper.  All of them dueled each other and came to see the truth.

"I don't know why we never tried this sooner!", one exclaimed.

"Oh, no..."

"What?"

"Here comes someone from Clan Diamond Shark."

Wrangler

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #45 on: 08 May 2019, 19:59:13 »
What Mech is blast whatever party it goes to?

Banzai
"Men, fetch the Urbanmechs.  We have an interrogation to attend to." - jklantern
"How do you defeat a Dragau? Shoot the damn thing. Lots." - Jellico 
"No, it's a "Most Awesome Blues Brothers scene Reenactment EVER" waiting to happen." VotW Destrier - Weirdo  
"It's 200 LY to Sian, we got a full load of shells, a half a platoon of Grenadiers, it's exploding outside, and we're wearing flak jackets." VoTW Destrier - Misterpants

rebs

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #46 on: 08 May 2019, 20:23:30 »
What 'mech is a plague of biblical proportions?

The Locust

ClarkeMarek

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Re: Mech Jokes
« Reply #47 on: 10 May 2019, 17:18:22 »
What do you call a mech that deactivates its jump jets when its pilot is stoned?

A High-lander.
"Son, if dynamite was dangerous, do you think they'd sell it to an idiot like me?"~Al Bundy
Five rounds, rapid!

 

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