Author Topic: The Salohma Club & Mechwarrior Bar...reclaimed (Read 250930 times)

Wombat · « **Reply #240 on:** 09 June 2011, 08:09:48 »

[Wombat, completely confused by the discussion of different nationalities, proceeds to try and think up something clever to say. When he can't, his widdle brain snaps in half...literally. Wombat waddles off screen and drives back in with a steamroller. Wombat proceeds to run over three waiters, a porcupine, and lastly Achoo. Twice.]

**SQUISH**

SethsMatches · « **Reply #241 on:** 09 June 2011, 08:30:14 »

That needs to go up on the wall.

*Frames and hangs Wombat's latest creation*

Let the Bidding begin!

Do I hear a Galaxy for this fine work? A Galaxy!?

Wombat · « **Reply #242 on:** 09 June 2011, 09:23:04 »

"All I have in my pouch is a barely used white dwarf star."

SethsMatches · « **Reply #243 on:** 09 June 2011, 09:24:52 »

We've a White Dwarf.

Any advance on a White Dwarf?!

The Mighty ACHOO · « **Reply #244 on:** 09 June 2011, 15:19:47 »

I bid a blue menace.

PurpleDragon · « **Reply #245 on:** 09 June 2011, 15:23:30 »

[being drug along behind a truck]

That's cheating!

[disappears out the other side of the thread]

Wombat · « **Reply #246 on:** 10 June 2011, 08:12:10 »

[Meanwhile, in some forign country, the naughty marsupial klaxon tries to hitchhike back to the Salohma Club.]

sir_spamalot · « **Reply #247 on:** 11 June 2011, 21:51:50 »

**Not before the klaxon pimp gets his money... best not mess with that ya dig.**

ShadowRaven · « **Reply #248 on:** 11 June 2011, 22:38:09 »

~flushes, washes his hand and comes back in, wondering if he missed anything~ nah, probably not.

Wombat · « **Reply #249 on:** 12 June 2011, 01:00:49 »

[Wombat licks the other hand clean.]

"...er wait. Are you left or right handed? I guess it really doesn't matter."

ShadowRaven · « **Reply #250 on:** 12 June 2011, 14:25:55 »

no...I guess it doesn't matter anymore.....

The Mighty ACHOO · « **Reply #251 on:** 13 June 2011, 09:05:23 »

Today's lunch special is Hungarian Goulash! Made with real Hungarians! Yum!

ShadowRaven · « **Reply #252 on:** 13 June 2011, 11:29:56 »

I'll take a gallon of molten lead to dip my hand in, thank you.

Wombat · « **Reply #253 on:** 13 June 2011, 16:08:30 »

[The awful jingle playing over the radio barely covers up ShadowRaven's screams...]

ShadowRaven · « **Reply #254 on:** 13 June 2011, 22:39:22 »

~once the screaming is over, SR pulls a glove over the now skeletal hand, and wiggles the fingers experimentally~ Free of Wombat drool at last. Now if only I could say the same about my wallet

Wombat · « **Reply #255 on:** 13 June 2011, 23:01:32 »

**ShadowRaven's wallet whimpers in pain**

The Mighty ACHOO · « **Reply #256 on:** 14 June 2011, 08:23:01 »

Well, if you hadn't bought that Wombat tongue wallet it would not be drooling. Silly darkcrow.

Wombat · « **Reply #257 on:** 14 June 2011, 09:30:37 »

[Wombat, in the meanwhile, sneaks into a morgue and steals a random cadaver foot (by way of hacksaw, of course) and then returns. The nefarious grin and bloodspatters on his widdle medical coat speaks of horrors...best unspoken. Wombat carefully takes the foot and duct tapes several firecrackers in it and then nods once they are secured inbetween the toes.]

"I don't want to go overboard, so I'm only using 3 megaton firecrackers today!"

[Wombat proceeds to hire three out-of-work beavers to gnaw Achoo's foot off and then sews on the random cadaver foot onto Achoo's bloody stump using fishing line and an old bicycle chain. Wombat nods his approval, causing his widdle brain to bounce around in his skull like a ping pong ball in a coffee can. Wombat lights the fuses and then ducks underneath a cast-iron bathtub...conveniently placed of course.]

**BOOM!!**

[Wombat proceeds to collect the cadaver foot...and Achoo's real foot, pouching them for "later".]

ShadowRaven · « **Reply #258 on:** 14 June 2011, 11:49:42 »

This explosion brought to you by Dr. Strangemarsupial. Or "how I learned to stop worrying and embrace the madness."

Wombat · « **Reply #259 on:** 14 June 2011, 12:49:13 »

[Wombat shrugs, pulls Achoo's foot out of his pouch-freezer, and licks it like a popsicle.]

The Mighty ACHOO · « **Reply #260 on:** 14 June 2011, 22:13:00 »

[Achoo's foot mutates, grows tentacles and very sharp pointy teeth, and grabs ahold of Wombat's nose and begins to chew it off]

Wombat · « **Reply #261 on:** 14 June 2011, 22:49:10 »

"Hey that tickles...it tickles it...ah...ah..."

"ACHOO!"

ShadowRaven · « **Reply #262 on:** 14 June 2011, 23:26:04 »

Hey boss, he's calling you?

Wombat · « **Reply #263 on:** 15 June 2011, 08:26:45 »

[A second Achoo from another time period arrives in a flash of pink swirling dust (since he was summoned) and looks at the other Achoo. Their eyebrows go up and down as they size each other up....and the "Everybody was Kung Foo fighting" song starts playing...]

The Mighty ACHOO · « **Reply #264 on:** 15 June 2011, 09:22:41 »

[And both Achoo's, along with Achoo's detached foot, begin to tag team pummel Wombat using ShadowRaven like a folding chair in the wrestling ring.]

SethsMatches · « **Reply #265 on:** 15 June 2011, 09:51:57 »

[watch]

Hit... ummm... IT! Again!

[watch]

Wombat · « **Reply #266 on:** 15 June 2011, 14:28:03 »

[Wombat quickly crawls into his pouch and returns a moment later with concrete-flavored Kool-aid, which he drinks and pats his belly. Immediately Wombat turns to stone, causing the folding chairs to bounce harmlessly on him.]

(unfortunately Concretebat realizes he can't move)

"...and I have to go pee!"

The Mighty ACHOO · « **Reply #267 on:** 15 June 2011, 22:36:27 »

[Puts Concretebat on top of ShadowRaven and walks away whistling...]

Wombat · « **Reply #268 on:** 16 June 2011, 08:31:11 »

[Unfortunately for everyone in the room, concretebat has been mixed with equal parts explosives and is now plastiquebat. Unfortunately the detonator is in Wombat's pouch. Thankfully nobody is stupid enough to press the bright glowing button on Wombat's belly...]

The Mighty ACHOO · « **Reply #269 on:** 16 June 2011, 23:42:03 »

[A brown siberian sabertoothed squirrel scampers into the scene. He runs up to plastiquebat and, following the directions given to him by the big pink guy that he can have all the acorns he could possibly want, pushes the bright glowing button on Wombat's belly to get his reward of lots and lots of nice acorns.]

At this point there is a rather loud KABOOM!